Duo's Demise
by Dyna Dee
Summary: YAOI Feeling betrayed by his lover and friends, Duo makes a drastic decision. Not quite a death fic
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters from Gundam Wing, nor make any profit from torturing poor Duo.

Duo's Demise

By: Dyna Dee

warnings: slight yaoi, heavy angst, Duo's POV

Sifting through the refrigerator, I'm looking for something, anything to alleviate the insatiable hunger I always feel after a mission. It doesn't seem to matter that I've eaten constantly since I've gotten up this morning, I'm still ravenous. Grabbing an apple and an orange from out of the bottom drawer, I note that Quatre has filled the place with wholesome food again and too few of the good snacks. I'll need to run to the store later and fix that little oversight.

I pause in the peeling of the orange to contemplate the two that are sitting in the living room, wondering what's up with them. We've shared the safehouse for several months and Heero and Wufei have been off on a mission for the last six weeks. Quatre and Trowa came back about three weeks ago and since then, I've sensed that something is definitely going on. Quatre seems to always be watching me from out of the corner of his eye, and Trowa in turn, watches Quatre. Not that he doesn't usually have his eye on His Blondness, but it's as if he watches him warily, not trusting. Odd not to trust Quatre. One day, I asked Q-man if something was wrong, if he needed to talk? But from across the room I saw Trowa shake his head and Quatre looked apologetic as he said nothing was wrong. Under my breath I quietly reassured him that I was his friend and if he needed any help or someone to talk to he could always come to me. For some reason, that statement seemed to make him feel bad as he gave me a tremulous smile and told me I could come to him anytime, too. 

I just can't figure out if he and Trowa are having a lover's quarrel or not, and I really don't want to butt in where I not welcome. But I'll stand ready at the first sign of trouble to intervene if things get out of hand. We Gundam pilots don't always handle things rationally.

With a deep sigh I come to the conclusion that love is complicated, even with Heero and myself. I don't fall in love easily, but I guess that when I do, I fall hard, because I free-fell into Heero and he is everything to me. The last six months that we've been together have taught me what it is to have hope and joy again. It's been so long since someone has loved me, cared for me, or that I dared to love again after losing everyone I ever cared about. Yeah, Heero isn't very demonstrative, but I know how he feels, even if the words and motions are hard and foreign to him. But being the perfect soldier, I have some confidence that he won't die and leave me alone like all of the other people I've loved. 

The beginning of our relationship was made easier, and we were both really relieved, when the other pilots seemed to accept our romantic involvement when it became apparent to them that our friendship had evolved. Even though it made things easier, Heero still isn't the easiest person to be with. His training and fixated focus on the mission make me less than number one on his list of priorities, and he keeps his emotions locked up much of the time.

I smile to myself though, as I think of those times when I am the center of his attention. Those rare smiles and gentle touches he gives to me, and only to me in the confines of our bedroom, make the cool, distant times more bearable.

These last six weeks have been hard, not seeing each other, but we have both been busy with missions. He e-mailed me just before I left for my last mission three days ago and said they would be returning soon and that he needed to talk to me privately. I chuckle to myself. Yeah, I want to "talk" to him privately, too. That was one of the phrases he always used to get me away from the others for a little alone time.

My musings were cut short when my ears pick up the sound of the front screen door opening, it has a loud squeaky hinge that grates on your ears.

"Where is he?" I hear Wufei ask, his voice suspiciously low. That's an odd greeting for the Chinese pilot, and I noticed his voice sounds strangely anxious. I guess he must be talking about me as Trowa and Quatre are in the front room. "Did you tell him?" was the next rushed question and my curiosity is definitely piqued. I wonder what they were suppose to tell me.

"No." Trowa answered rather firmly. "It wasn't for us to tell."

"This is going to be difficult." There was a worried tone in Wufei's voice. I didn't think Wu worried about anything other than justice. I moved closer to the door so I could hear more clearly.

"You should have thought of that before you took up with....." Trowa was halted suddenly.

"Shhhhhh!!!" Quatre ended the conversation abruptly.

Taking that as my cue, I walked through the kitchen door, letting it swing behind me. "Wufei! You're back." I tried to act normal and quickly embrace him. He's stiff and unyielding. "Where's Heero?" I ask and note that neither Quatre nor Trowa are looking at us. Odd again. Wufei looks past me with guilt written all over his face.

"He's on the porch, waiting for you."

I feel a bit of relief flood through me as I'd begun to think something horrible had happened to Heero and they'd been afraid to tell me. I wave, fruit in hand, as I turn to the front door. "Glad you're back." I call out with a smile.

I find Heero sitting on the top porch step. His eyes are focused on the sidewalk, even as my booted feet announce my arrival on the wood surface. I sit next to him, draping my arm around his shoulders and offer him my apple and give him a quick squeeze, noticing he also is stiff, rigid, and unyielding.

"What's the matter, Heero? Did something go wrong on the mission?" I ask gently, growing more concerned by the moment by his rigid body language.

Heero turns his head and shoulders to face me, shrugging off my arm in the process. His cobalt blue eyes are distant and cold, he's in soldier mode. A tremor of dread runs through me. Heero opens his mouth, and in his own unemotional, rational, and concise manner, delivers the words that take the breath from me, sucker punch me is a more apt description. Both pieces of fruit drop from my slack hands as his words sink in.

I jump to my feet and off the porch steps to face him, my legs unsteady. I know my mouth is gaping open, my eyes are wide with dismay, and I find I can't think clearly or really hear what he is saying any longer. I'm stunned and rendered absolutely speechless. Though I'm dimly aware that Heero's voice drones on, and I can only grasp a few words as my word spins around me, a blur of sounds and colors cascading about wildly, and absolutely, completely out of my control. He and Wufei had slept together, this was now clear to me. Something about being lonely, exploring new avenues, new feelings. He hopes I'll understand. UNDERSTAND!!!!!

At some point, the shock wears off enough that I can think somewhat coherently, and then it hits, the pain radiating in me finally registers in my brain. I feel as if someone has taken a blunt piece of metal and is shoving it through my chest and impaling my heart. I let the look of hurt and betrayal show, for in all honesty, it's all I feel.

I look around me, dazed, my eyes unfocused, and almost distantly I hear Heero call my name concerned. Concerned? Yeah right! He should have thought of that before he........ Wait, the words that I'd heard from the kitchen now come back to me. I turn and stumble up the stairs and burst into the house to face the other three.

"I'm sorry, Duo." Wufei has the audacity to speak to me in an apologetic tone as I brush by him.

I stop to look him in the eyes, letting him see fully the impact of what his actions have done to me. "Go to hell, Wufei!" I scream and turn to look at the two accomplices sitting on the couch. "You knew, didn't you?" I shout, accusing them with a pointing finger, my angry voice rising. Quatre's hand is clasped to his chest and his eyes are apologetic. He nods his head.

"It wasn't for us to tell you, Duo. That was Heero's responsibility." Trowa informs me looking smug and totally self justified with his part in this mess called my life.

I look at them, pain enveloping my whole being by their betrayal. "I thought you were my friends." My voice has lowered to an agonized whisper, and cracks with emotion. Then an old saying pops into my mind and I speak it out loud. "But with friends like you, who needs enemies, ne?" I look at the three of them. "To me, your names are Judas." I turned, ignoring Heero at the front door, and bolt up the stairs to the safety of my room, slamming the door as hard as I can, cracking the frame as a result. Once inside, I crumble to my knees and bend over into a ball, letting myself fall to the floor. This is a similitude of how I feel inside; crushed and made small by the betrayal of my lover and my closest and only friends.

I cry silently, giving my grief and pain somewhat of an outlet. I love and lose, the cycle continues. I had erroneously thought I could only lose Heero to death, I never thought I'd lose him to another, a friend. In my stubborn pride, I determine not to let the others hear my grief and pain. But it hurts, unbearably so. At the same time that I am hollowed by my grief and feelings of betrayal, I was also filled and consumed by it. I channel it, letting it swell inside me completely, giving me the adrenaline and energy to pick myself up off the floor. I look rapidly, almost frantic around the room. My room, no longer our room. I run to Heero's dresser and pull out the clothing and items he'd left behind when he went on his mission, a physical sign to me that he would be coming back. I grab an armful, and running to the door I open it and angrily hurl them into the hallway, then return for more. Once his drawers are vacant, I turn to the closet and empty it of his few belongings. Then his blankets, sheets, pillow, and even his mattress goes flying out the bedroom door to crash onto the opposite wall in the now cluttered hallway. At last, every trace of Heero is out of the room. I slam the door on the sorry pile that represents Heero,.......and us.

It's late in the evening, and a timid knock sounds on my door. It's Quatre, of course. "Duo, I've left some food here by the door for you, if your hungry. Duo?"

As if food or his gesture is going to assuage my pain, or lessen his betrayal. I wait patiently until his footsteps retreat, and then I open the door. No one's in the hallway and Heero's stuff is gone. I pick up the plate of hot food, balance it in my hand, and throw it as hard as I can so that it smashes against the door at the end of the hallway, Wufei's room. The dish breaks and falls to the ground, the food is splattered in clumps and streaks down the wooden surface with more landing on the carpet along with the shatter pieces of the plate. I feel a minute sense of satisfaction at the mess that reminds me of my life, shattered and smeared. Calmly, I shut the door and turn on my portable t.v. and let the sound drown out any noises the others might make.

Sleep eludes me most of the night, and what little I got was fitful As the sun shows faint signs of rising far beyond the eastern edge of the forest surrounding the safehouse, I begin to feel hungry, despite the hurt and anger I still feel. In the predawn light, I open my window and climb out, taking my wallet and black backpack with me. I walk to the 24-hour convenience store several miles down the road. I can't ever remember feeling this dispassionate about food before, it's always been one of my obsessions. I wander up and down the isles, dully looking for snack foods, things that don't require refrigeration or cooking. I end up selecting breakfast bars, granola bars, can and dried fruit, beef jerky, water and fruit drinks, snacks heavy on the sugar and salt, and some fresh fruit. Satisfied that I have enough to last a few days, I determine that I'll probably have to leave often as I did this morning to have a meal in town to keep up my stamina. A nice big breakfast sounded good right now. I will starve myself before I share a meal with THEM (as I have come to refer to my former friends).

After eating a very early morning breakfast at a local café, I begin the journey back to the safehouse. I arrive around 8:30 a.m. hoping to avoid the others. The Chinese traitor is on the lawn in the front of the house practicing his ritual morning exercises. I walk past him like we have no past, no present, and definitely no future. He watches me, but doesn't say a word. I'm glad. I have nothing more to say to him.

Entering the house I go straight to my room and lock the door. On goes my music system and the t.v. The call for breakfast went unheeded, as did the one for lunch and dinner.

Days pass in relatively the same way as a pattern develops. I wake up and turn on my music and t.v., eat in my room, and turn on my laptop until lunch time. The call to lunch means the others are downstairs so I feel safe in making use of the bathroom, showering and general personal maintenance.

I eat a sparse lunch and return to reading or hacking into the Alliance financial systems, pilfering funds and transferring them through a web of false trails to a safe account.

At dusk I leave for town to spend my time with strangers in restaurants, movie theaters, and an occasional party. If I come back earlier than midnight, my music and t.v. are turned on until I feel sleepy enough to fall into oblivion and when there are so other sounds of activity in the house, usually around 2 a.m.

On the fifth day of my self-imposed confinement, Heero knocked on my door, informing me we had a mission. I tell him to "Go to hell." that I wouldn't be going on any mission with anyone I didn't trust, and that meant all of THEM. With as few words as possible I tell him that Professor G will be giving me any further mission orders.

Heero tried to argue with me through the door, but it's hard to argue when the other person doesn't respond. 'My, how the tables have turned', I thought ironically.

During the weeks that followed, I did a couple of solo missions. Nothing as spectacular as when several of us hit a base. But the missions served to enlighten me. I discover that my heart just isn't in it anymore. Gone is my righteous indignation against the Alliance and OZ. I just don't care. I feel like my heart is dead. I feel dead. I can't forget nor forgive the others. I still ache and, at times, I've had my gun in my hand wishing it would all end, the curse that plagues me, the pain and the bitter emptiness that envelopes me. My world is grey now, no colors or brightness to be seen, I'm lifeless and listless. I remember a saying, Sorrow looks back, Fear looks around, Faith looks upward, and Hope looks forward. I can't seem to look up or forward any more. 

During this time, each of THEM has come to my door, one by one, entreating me to talk to them, asking forgiveness. I couldn't, I can't. I don't think I'll ever be able to trust them again. My replies to each of them all were in short, concise sentences, all containing one particular word. "Get the hell away from me. Leave me the hell alone. Go to hell...." well, you get the picture. I figure if I'm in hell, they might as well share a part of it with me. As they continue to entreat me, I simply turn up my music and t.v. to drown out the sound of their voices. I almost feel a smug satisfaction knowing that I'm bugging the hell out of them.

Another day comes and goes and I'm miserable, my existence is becoming unbearable. I know I can't go on like this and realize that what I'm doing is a slow, torturous form of self-destruction. I'm losing weight, I look skinny and gaunt. My eyes are ringed with dark circles and look haunted. I hate THEM, myself, the world, my life and the war.

It's late now, and the house is still now that I've just turned off my music and t.v. to rest, I lay in my bed half awake, half asleep. This is generally the time of day when I'm calm enough to think, when my best ideas and reflections come. I think of Sister Helen and of the many prayers I'd heard her utter on my behalf as she tucked me into bed at night. She nightly raised her gentle voice as she reverently bowed her head in the posture of prayer to God that I would find happiness, a good and productive life, and someone to love me. Anger and remorse courses through me at the realization that I have let her down. If I keep going on like this, I will make all her prayers on my behalf nothing but wasted breath, and each breath that she drew had been a blessing to me. She meant more to me than that, I determine. I suddenly remember a saying that she often quoted to me. She had it was cross-stitched on fabric and hung on the wall in the orphanage to remind us of it daily. It was by someone long dead person named Goethe. It said simply, "I find the great thing in the world is, not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving." I feel ashamed. The words were meaningful to her, living on a poor colony, in a run down building, and living at poverty level. Still, she and Father Maxwell were moving in the direction they had chosen and loved, caring for the thrown away children had brought them joy that they shared freely. Guilt overrides me. I have spent these past weeks in a murky, muddy mire, not entirely all of my own making, but I realize that I'm the only one who can change it, change my direction. I wonder when was the last time I truly had control of the direction I was moving. I think not since I took up the role of Shinigami. On this night, a night of long reflection and with the memory of the past of where I had wanted to go in answer to a nun's fervent prayers, a solution to my dilemma comes to me, a plan begin to form. I get up, turn on the light and my laptop, and begin to work, adjusting accounts, seeking information. By the time the sun rises, my plan is formed, only a few major details need to be worked out. But if I still have any luck at all, then Duo Maxwell and Shinigami will soon die in a memorable blaze of glory.

*****

During and between missions I've managed to complete a couple of the major obstacles that have kept me from implementing my plan. I know our time at this safehouse is nearly at an end, so I have to move quickly as I will not be moving with THEM.

I received another mission. This should be my last one if I can only find the last item on my list that will set everything in motion, and end my life with definite finality.

This is a fairly easy mission, but as I do my surveillance with my night-vision binoculars, I catch a glimpse of what I need, the final piece. It's dark and there are soldiers set around the perimeter of the fence. My heart quickens as I see my new target. I feel only a slight twinge about what I'm about to do, but I realize when I attack at dawn, all the ground soldiers will no doubt die anyway. The night is nearly black, with only a sliver of a crescent moon lighting the heavens above. Leaving the safety of Deathscythe, I make my way to the far right perimeter. I'm grateful once again that my favorite color is black as it effectively hides me in the night's shadows and makes it easy for me to sneak up on my prey. I'm surprised when he seems to detect me, I must be losing more of my edge than I thought, and he turns in my direction, instinctively scanning for something, crouching in a defensive pose. I leap and tackle him. We both struggle desperately with our weapons, both of us seemed to prefer knives this night. We're relatively the same height, short and I can see his hair is as close to my hair color as I have seen during my search. We battle silently and hard, grunting the only sound in our struggle. He is a better soldier than I had anticipated. In the end, though, he lies dead at the end of my knife, and I have a deep slash to my outer right thigh and my left shoulder has been pierced. It hurts like hell lifting the dead body up on my good shoulder to carry him back to Deathscythe. I ignore the pain and fatigue for this is the beginning of Duo Maxwell's end. I sigh in relief that the end to all my misery is near and soon, I can truly rest. 

I manage to finish my last mission with no enthusiasm at all, signaling to my tired mind that I'm making the right decision. I can't do this any more. Putting on the cloaking device and auto pilot, I let myself sleep until I arrive at the safehouse several hours later.

It's late morning as I enter the house through the front door. I'm weak from the loss of blood and so little rest. I must look terrible as Wufei looks up at me in alarm and jumps up from the couch and runs to my side.

"Maxwell, you're hurt!" he exclaims, his eyes scanning the tears in my clothing and visible wounds and moves to help.

"Don't touch me." I hissed through my gritted teeth.

"Don't be ridiculous. You need medical attention." He snaps back, irritated by my refusal.

"I'd rather die of gangrene than have you pour salt into my wounds." is my cold reply. "Now get the hell away from me." I had to get "hell" in one of my sentences, it was a tradition now.

"Duo!" Quatre appears out of nowhere and cautiously reaches out his hand to me. I ignore him and limp up the stairs, quietly shutting the door behind me.

I manage to patch myself up and take the penicillin pills Sally Poe regularly sends to us. I need stitches in my leg, but I don't have the stomach for it, so I press the skin together with butterfly bandages and wrap it tightly in gauze. I finish up with my computer and put a disk of all I've copied from it into my back pack. I then delete all my computer files and programs and put in a virus, just for good measure.

I can hear activity in the kitchen below and decide that its time for my shower. The hot water calms me and soothes the aches in my body. I pay special attention to my hair, using my favorite and expensive shampoo and fragrant conditioner. I stay in the steaming shower until the water cools noticeably.

Leaving the bathroom with only a towel around my waist, my wet, towel-dried hair trailing down my back, I'm taken off guard as I see Trowa standing at the top of the stairs leaning against the wall, his arms folded. He's poised as if he's been waiting for a while.

"Any hot water left?" he jokes with a slight smile.

I ignore him and move to my room.

"Come on, Duo. Snap out of it already. Haven't you punished us enough?" he asks quietly. "It's been five weeks."

My back stiffens at his words and I turn to cooly face him. His smile immediately fades. "Is there a specific amount of time allotted for recovery for a heart that had been pulled out of your chest and trampled on?" I ask venomously.

"We're sorry, Duo. All of us." he says in earnest.

I shake my head. "Sorry is an empty and meaningless word, just a word." I look him in the eye. "And yours is too little, too late." I turn and enter my room, locking the door.

I wonder as I lean against the door why I stayed at the safehouse and didn't leave on the first day. Was I punishing THEM or myself? If the truth be known, it was probably both. I don't really know. But I realize that it was for the best that I'd stayed, as my exit from the world would not have the impact I needed if THEY weren't around to witness the final scene that would be played out in the morning.

Everything is set. I just need to bide my time. I move to turn on my music and loudly play my favorite. The t.v. is on also, though the sound is down. I sit in a chair by the window and look out on the green meadow that separates the country safehouse from the forest where our gundams are hidden. I drag my fingers through my damp hair, bringing a handful up to my face. I deeply inhale the scent I put in it, a sweet musk smell. Memories that my hair conjure up come to me now, all the people I've lost. They are all remembered each time I braid the long, thick mass that is, in a way, a visible memorial to them. They had each touched and combed my wild and tangled mane of hair when they were alive. The lower part of my braid represented the point in time they were alive. I suddenly break down and weep into the moist mass that is such an intricate part of Duo Maxwell. I mourn my loved ones, past and present once more, one last time.

Time lost all meaning as I grieved and my memories washed over me again. But I'm abruptly brought out of my reverie when I hear the loud banging on my door. I'm surprised to realize it's dark inside and out of my room, and I turn my head to see the clock read 1:58 a.m. As if in a trance, I turn back to look at the meadow now awash in the soft glow of the waxing gibbous moon.

Suddenly, the door crashes open, the lock broken and the door frame cracked further. Heero stomps over to my stereo and shuts it off. He stands by the dresser, his hands on his hips.

"Enough of this Duo. We need to talk." he demands, exasperation in his voice.

"Get the hell out of my room." I reply harshly and look away from him.

"Look, I'm sorry." he begins, his voice softens and I can see out of the corner of my eye that he is moving towards me. Reaching out, I place my hand on the gun that I've kept on the windowsill, letting it scrape against the wood surface as a warning to him. I quickly turn and raise it to aim at his chest.

"I said get the hell out of my room." I grind out as I release the safety.

Heero puts his hands out to show me he is unarmed. "Duo." he growls in warning and takes another step.

I lower the gun and pull the trigger, shooting him in the left upper thigh. I look at him dispassionately as he falls back on his butt, clutching his leg.

The sound of running feet announce the arrival of the other three who stand silhouetted in the doorway. Wufei moves to kneel by Heero. In the glow of the t.v. screen, I can see his look of angry accusation.

"Get out of my room." I say again, each word pronounced slowly and singly.

"What are you going to do, Duo?" Trowa asks as he and Quatre enter to stand behind the other two. "Shoot all of us?"

"No, just one of us." I answer as I stand, turn towards them clad only in my boxers and loose hair, and put the cold barrel of the gun into my mouth even as I meet their disbelieving and horrified faces with a cold, blank stare.

"By Allah! We're going, Duo. Don't, please, don't." Quatre pleads with his hand out and all of their eyes are trained on me as they rush to pick up Heero and pull him back out the door. I follow them, gun still in my mouth as I use my foot to shut it firmly behind them. Pulling the gun out of my mouth, I make a funny, screwed up face. "Yuck, that tastes terrible." I mutter and releasing the trigger on the gun, I move to go to my bed. I hadn't planned on this happening, and now I won't be able to sleep at all as I can't trust the others not to try and take me down as I rest. I leave my music off in order to hear the movements around the house. I only have a few hours left to wait. 

Taking a deep breath, I pause for a last look around my room. The clock states it's almost 10:00 a.m. I heard breakfast being prepared a while ago, so I know the others are in the kitchen. My bed is piled up with all my personal belongings in the middle of it, and I'd rigged a special, small incendiary device under them. "Goodbye." I whisper thoughtfully to my past and walk out the door pulling my black cap firmly down on my head and shutting the much abused door behind me.

Entering the kitchen, I'm not surprised to see them all at the table watching for me. I'd made a point of letting my footfalls be heard as I came down the stairs, warning them of my approach. I can see Heero and Trowa have their hands under the table, probably pointing a gun at me should I make a wrong move. Suddenly, I feel nervous, even though I've practiced what I want to say. I rub my sweaty palms against the hip of my black pants. I'm wearing my black priest's outfit.....for the last time. I'm acutely aware of my surroundings and myself. My braid hangs purposely over my right shoulder, and I can feel my switchblade, keys, and remote detonator in my pocket. My gun is in my shoulder holster in plain sight.

"I have something to say and I don't want to be interrupted. After that, I'm outta your hair." I tell my captive audience in a somewhat calm and cool voice.

Trowa and Wufei nod.

I have planned my speech carefully, but somehow, my emotions begin to rise to the surface. I have to fight them back, both the tears and the heaviness in my heart. I thought I'd exhausted both in the last five weeks. From under the brim of my hat, I turn my gaze to Wufei first.

"You broke one of the golden rules of friendship, Wufei." I begin. "Never go after your friend's lover, past or present. It always ruins a friendship" I manage a sick, thin-lipped smile. "Congratulations, you managed to kill two birds with one stone." then my smile, such as it is, fades, and I know a look of sorrow replaces it.. "How could you, Wufei?" I ask softly. "I've had so little in my life. Did you have to take away the only thing that made it worth living?" I shake my head sadly. "There is no honor in what you did."

Wufei's head bows, his eyes no longer able to hold my watery stare.

I turn to Quatre and Trowa. "I'll address the both of you since you're joined at the hip." I snort derisively. "You betrayed my friendship as surely as Wufei and Heero. You should have told me. Your silence made you co-conspirators in their betrayal. Quatre alone probably knows how I feel." I look at the small blonde whose eyes were blood shot and ringed with dark circles. He looked thinner. Yep, Quatre knows how I feel.

I slowly turn my eyes to Heero who sits at the end of the table dressed in his usual tank top and shorts. His wounded thigh is wrapped and stretched out stiffly in front of him. I force myself to look into his eyes and my heart constricts painfully knowing that I still love him despite his betrayal. My voice catches in my throat as my emotions resurface. I close my eyes, trying to gain control and quickly rub away the errant tear that escapes with a quiet, muttered curse.

"Heero," I begin, and I'm dimly surprised at how my voice is shaking. "I didn't deserve what you did to me." I shake my head. "I gave you my heart, my soul, and my body...," I swallow hard. "and you threw it all away like yesterdays garbage." I turned my hurt and horrified eyes to him letting him see what he had done to me. "I helped you find a bit of your humanity, and you thank me by taking up with another without letting me go first. Guess we never had a talk about fidelity." I tried to smirk, but failed miserable.

"Duo, I...." Heero reaches out to me, a look of desolation in his blue eyes.

"Shut up! Shut the hell up!" I yell as my emotions explode. To my amazement I find myself openly crying now. It was time to end this. "You four broke me more effectively than any Oz interrogator could have." I sniff, and let the tears fall unattended as I reach into my right pocket and palm the switch blade in my right hand. "I only have one thing left of value to me." I say, pulling my braid with my left hand, and removing my right hand from my pocket, I flicked open the blade in a quick, smooth movement and brought it to my neck. In two deft strokes and in less than three seconds, I severed my braid at my shoulder and flung its length onto the table to have it land in front of Heero. Four disbelieving faces stare at it.

"That's the last thing I have to give you. Keep it as a trophy, or toss it away as you did me." I say sadly. "It doesn't matter any more. I won't need it where I'm going." 

With that said, I turn and run from the room, pushing the detonator in my pocket as I reach for my duffel bag.

I hear Heero's voice call out to me, sounding desperate, but dead men don't answer, do they? My heart is pounding furiously in my chest as I run across the short meadow, looking behind me to catch a glimpse of Wufei standing on the porch in front of the house, and the flicker of a growing fire from my open bedroom window. I turn and run into the forest where the final scene is yet to be played out.

I arrive at Deathscythe with my heart racing. This is it. There's no turning back now. I ride the foot cable up to the hatch and key open the door to the black killing machine. Ugh, it smells like death warmed over in the cockpit. Just as it should be, since there's a dead guy sitting in the pilot's chair. The soldier I killed yesterday sits slumped over in the loosely strapped chair. I'm glad I'd taken the time yesterday to dress him in one of my priest outfits. Man, he's ripe!

Bending to unzip my duffel bag, I remove my backpack from it. Off comes my hat, shaking my new shoulder length air to get a feel of it. I remove my gun and holster and then my outer clothing, for underneath it all I'm wearing blue jeans and a white t-shirt. I throw my trademark outfit into the C-4 loaded cabin and place the duffel bag on the corpse's lap. There is only one thing left to do. I reach up and around my neck and unfasten the clasp of the gold chain that holds my crucifix. I gently, almost hesitatingly, lay it on top of the duffel bag.

"I'm sorry." I say in all honesty to the dead man that vaguely resembles me. "I promise you that I'll never kill again."

Taking the remote detonator switch I had left in care of the corpse, I pick up my back- pack and ride the cable down. I'd left my new motorcycle behind the heel of my gundam for the last few days. This was one of my last purchases and the others knew nothing about it.

Putting the key in the ignition, I turn the engine on and it purrs quietly to life. I carefully navigate it away from Deathscythe, dragging a tree branch behind to hid my tracks as I move in the direction of the nearest highway not far away. 

Checking my watch, I see the whole episode has taken only 10 minutes. I reach the road and let the motorcycle go, picking up speed nicely and sending a ripple of excitement through me. It's a thrilling sensation to be speeding down the deserted road. My newly cut hair whips around my face as if it, too, relishes its new freedom. Reaching into my pocket, I bring out the detonator and depress it. The sound filling the air is deafening and the road beneath the bike convulses from the shock of the explosion. Slowing down, I look behind me and see the dark smoke and some falling debris from the explosion that marks my passage into a new life. Duo Maxwell is dead, as is his other half in the war, Shinigami. I've taken the first steps to leave my past behind me, the war, and any hope for a return. I will now take charge of the direction of my life, create a new past, and with it, a new future. As a line from an old song said,. "I ain't gonna study war no more". Just maybe, someday, I'll learn to smile again, to trust and care again. But for now, I'm glad to be free and looking ahead as the road of possibilities stretch out before me like the road under the wheels of my motorcycle. 

TBC


	2. Heero's POV

Duo's Demise

Heero's POV

Chapter 2

Warnings: yaoi, and just when you put the Kleenex box away, angst. I forgot to mention on the first part that this fic is definitely AU

It's been two months now since Duo...... Even now I can't bring myself to say it. Quatre contacted me the other day. It seems he and Trowa are still apart, as are Wufei and I from each other... and them. I think the guilt of what's happened has made it too difficult for any of us to be together just now.

I miss him. I miss them.

Quatre strongly suggested that in our time between missions, each of us should write down what we could remember of those last five weeks together. He said that Duo's message and pain were too important for us to forget, and that by writing it down, it might become more clear to us so that we will never make the same mistakes again.

I never realized what a huge mistake I'd made until I saw Duo jump up from his place on the porch from next to me and stared at me in shock. I tried to rationally explain to him that I had felt lonely during our separation, and one night, as I comforted Wufei from a nightmare, well, things just happened. I didn't know that Wufei was feeling so alone, my feelings of loneliness paled in comparison to his loss and loneliness.

I was still new in understanding and learning about emotions and feelings, and I've still got a long way to go. I was new to love. Duo had awakened me to so many things, emotions and feelings that I had never grasped before, and that night, he wasn't there to help me figure out what to do. I rationalized my way into the predicament I found myself in. I liked Wufei, and he seemed to need me. I did what I thought Duo would want me to do, and I comforted him the only way I knew how. I was wrong, dead wrong.

I watched with morbid fascination as the apple and half peeled orange he'd held in his hands dropped and split open on the porch surface, and then rolled down the wooden steps to lay bruised and inedible on the sidewalk. A premonition of what was about to happen shivered up my spine. I tried to explain calmly to Duo that what had happened didn't change how I felt about him, that maybe it was good to explore new emotional avenues so that I could understand emotions and relationships more fully. I ended saying that I hoped he would understand. But when I looked up and into his large expressive eyes, I saw something in his face that I had never seen before, the look of unbearable hurt and betrayal. All color drained from his face and his eyes looked unfocused and dazed. I began to fear for him.

"Duo..." I reached out for him, but suddenly he looked up to the front door as if something had just occurred to him, and he stumbled up the stairs and went in. I feared for a moment that he was going to retaliate on Wufei, but all I heard him say was, "Go to hell, Wufei." I stood in the doorway as he turned accusingly to Quatre and Trowa sitting on the couch. He was mad at them for not preparing him, that they knew of my betrayal and didn't tell him. He called them all Judas and then turned and ran up the stairs to our room. I heard the door slam with a loud crack.

We all watched as Quatre clutched at his chest, his eyes squeezed shut, tears escaping from the corners. Reacting empathically to Duo's pain, he curled into a ball and lay on the couch in silent agony. It was then that I truly realized how deeply I had hurt the one person that I loved.

Wufei and I sat down dejectedly and watched as Trowa tried to sooth Quatre with soft words and comforting touches. Trowa had brought himself closer to the blonde and rested his golden head on his thigh, looking up to glare angrily at the two of us sitting across from them.

"Well, I hope it was worth it." he said, his voice as cold as gundanium in space.

Wufei lowered his head into his hands and groaned. "What have we done."

I could only sit there, mutely aware that I had just lost the best thing in my life, and I don't know if I even realized it until it was gone.

"What's a Judas?" I asked, never having heard that term before.

Wufei sat back just enough to remove his hands from his agonized face and turned his head to look at me, dumbfounded at my ignorance. "Judas was a man in ancient times, in Duo's religion. He betrayed the one person who loved him unconditionally for a handful of silver. He is not remembered well; it's a derogatory term."

I just sat for a while, thinking of what Duo had called us as Quatre silently cried, his quiet sniffles the only clue to Duo's silent anguish upstairs. Duo was right, I had betrayed him, more so than the others. 

After a while, we could definitely hear some activity upstairs, but I waited until it was quiet again to make my way up, hoping I could talk to Duo, to somehow make it right. But as I reached the top of the landing, I saw all my belongings thrown onto the floor, even the mattress which was slumped against the wall. He was done with me, and from what the others had been saying, it's what I should have expected.

Wufei followed me up and stood behind me. "I'll help you move them into my room." he said quietly. Silently, we both began to pick my things up and hoped that Duo hadn't heard.

Days passed and Duo continued to stay apart from us; not sharing meals, watching t.v., or hanging out as he usually did. We missed him. Each of us tried to talk to him, to reason with him through the bedroom door, only to be rudely rebuffed. I think it's what we deserved.

I received orders for Wing and Deathscythe to destroy a transport train and supply terminal. I was secretly elated. Maybe alone, I could talk to Duo, apologize again. He curtly told me he was going solo. He didn't trust any of us anymore. I think he was teaching me something new, feelings I hadn't experienced much, shame and sorrow.

I felt the need to make this right again, and not knowing how, I went to find Quatre. He and Duo had been close friends. Looking tired and clutching at his chest and with watery eyes, Quatre told me that Duo was in too much pain to talk to me. It was obvious that he was feeling Duo's pain, and was suffering for it. That short talk with the Arabian showed me again how wrong I had been to turn to Wufei. Quatre, in return, asked me why? Why had I cheated on Duo when the American loved me more than anything? How could I reject him in such a way, knowing he had lost nearly all those he had loved and trusted?

I hadn't realized I had "cheated" or that it was wrong. I had no experience in anything other than being a soldier. Never even remembered a role model of a couple relationship. Duo always tried to get me to follow my emotions. I think that's what led me to him in the first place, he was the bright light in my grey world. He held in his eyes the promised hope of a fuller existence. He grounded me to life, to the good things in life. 

I know now that I was weak. At the time, I was lonely being away from him and was drawn to Wufei. His strength and inner vulnerability was attractive to me. I ignorantly followed my emotions. Wufei had asked that first night as we held each other about Duo, what would he say and how would he react to what we'd done? I told him simply that he would understand, after all, I was following his advice to follow my emotions. I never envisioned the emotional devastation I would soon cause him. I wasn't trained to interact in any way other than as a professional soldier. But I think the others knew how he would react. Why else did Quatre and Trowa keep it from him? I'll never forget the look of horror on their faces when they silently picked the lock and walked into our dorm room trying to surprise us, but instead, they got the shock of their lives when they found Wufei and I in bed together. That should have been my first clue that what I had done was so wrong.

Quatre looked at me with pity. He tried to explain to me the expectations that are assumed when two people are involved in an intimate relationship, especially if they are in love.

Wufei also tried to help me, even in his own guilt-ridden state. From the moment we returned, we shared a bed only once in a while, and that was merely to hold each other, to offer comfort. Each of us is too riddled with guilt to enjoy any other touch than that of a friend's comforting embrace.

We were all shocked by the minute glimpses we got of Duo as he walked past us coming or going from the safehouse. He was growing thinner, and his features were drawn and tight. We felt helpless, none of us knew what to do. Weeks went by as a pattern had set in. We accepted missions as they came in, and Duo had left several times on his own in Deathscythe. Each time I was relieved and surprised when he returned. Daily his television and stereo played endlessly. I think he was trying to drown us out.

Then one day, five weeks from when the nightmare had started, Duo returned from a mission. He staggered in looking half dead, blood running from a wound to his shoulder and from a long gash that ran from his thigh down to his knee. Wufei rushed to help him, but Duo curtly refused any help from him or Quatre, and as soon as the bedroom door closed, his loud music came on and shook the house.

"This can't go on." Trowa said, looking at the stairway as the Arabian teen sat on the couch next to him.. "He's destroying himself. We should try talking to him again."

"We've tried, Trowa." Quatre replied sadly and he laid his head back wearily on the couch and closed his dark rimmed eyes. "He won't listen to any of us."

The Heavyarm's pilot sighed. "I'll try again after lunch."

He came to us later and reported that he had waited for Duo to come out of the shower and tried to talk to him. It didn't go well, and the music continued to play on loudly. I recognized it now as some of Duo's favorite. I hoped at the time that in listening to the more upbeat tunes than those he'd chosen over the last few weeks, that maybe his anger was easing. The music stayed on, loudly through the day and evening. Finally at 2 a.m., Wufei urged me to ask Duo to turn it off as none of us were able to sleep with the noise. He suggested that maybe Duo would talk to me now.

I approached his door with that hope in mind. Dressed only in my boxers and t-shirt, I pounded on his door so that he could hear it above the loud music, acutely aware that everyone in the house was awake and listening.

He either didn't hear me or was, as usual, ignoring me. I hate being ignored. With a well aimed kick, his door flew open and I saw him beautifully silhouetted by the light of the moon while sitting in a chair by the window. His wonderful hair was unbound and fell all around his thin body. He looked ethereal. Coming out of my momentary daze, I moved to turn off the stereo.

"Enough of this, Duo. We need to talk." I told him, surprised that my voice came out so harshly. I moved towards him, longing to hold him in my arms once again. 

I registered the sound of metal scraping on wood and blinked as I saw him raise his gun and level it at my chest. No one points a gun at me and gets away with it. I ignore his demand to leave the room and took a step forward. "Duo." my voice was low in warning. I hoped to stop this nonsense once and for all.

A burning pain hit my thigh at the same time I heard the report of his gun. He shot me! I couldn't believe he shot me once again. I fell back to sit on the floor and clutch my wounded leg. I looked up at him in disbelief, even as I heard the others running down the hallway. Between my wound and the thoughts running through my head I didn't exactly hear the exchange between Duo and Trowa, but I did understand his meaning when I saw him stand up and put the barrel of the pistol into his mouth. Quatre's voice rang out, begging him not to kill himself. I was quickly dragged out the door as Duo followed, the gun still in his mouth as he lifted his foot and slammed the door shut on our shocked faces. 

We didn't sleep much that night as my wound was tended to and our nerves were shaken by the night's events. Our ears were tuned to any sound coming from the bedroom above us, each of us silently hoping we wouldn't hear the gun go off.

We had a late breakfast and were trying to decide what to do, when we heard foot falls on the stairs. Trowa and I both grabbed our guns, knowing we would only use them in self-defense.

He came into the kitchen wearing his priest's outfit, his gun visible in his shoulder holster, and paused, his pained, blood-shot eyes taking in the four of us sitting at the table. He told us he had something to say and didn't want us to interrupt. We accepted his terms, we owed it to him. I could see, even under the brim of his favorite black hat, that he was struggling with his emotions. I wanted to do something to help, but realized that anything I did now would probably make it worse. After all, I was the one that caused him that pain.

We sat quietly as he spoke to each of us of our betrayals. First Wufei, who bowed his head in shame. Then Trowa and Quatre. They too, accepted their part in his pain. Then he turned his accusing eyes to me. I guess I never realized the depth of his love for me and what it had cost him. He said I threw him away like yesterday's garbage. I never would have seen it like that, but now, I understand why he had been so upset, felt so betrayed. He even tried to joke about fidelity, a word I lacked in my vocabulary, but his emotions began to surface and he had to struggle to control them. Again, I wanted to help, somehow.

"Duo,....I..."

He yelled at me to shut up. I had broken the agreement. The pain in his eyes told me he had earned the right to have my silence. 

He was crying......., and it was tearing me apart.

Suddenly, he reached up, clutching his braid by his neck, and with a knife I hadn't seen a second before, he severed his braid and threw it's long length onto the table, landing in front of me. He told me I could think of it as a trophy or just throw it away, just as I had thrown him away. 

I stared at the chestnut colored mass dumbfounded and confused as his words washed over me that it didn't matter, he wouldn't need it where he was going. The words didn't fully sink in until I looked up and he was gone. I called out his name in desperation, but I knew he was gone. I had lost him forever.

Wufei stood and followed to watch him pick up his duffel bag and run out the door. "He's going to his gundam." he reported and sighed as his shoulders slumped. "That cold piece of metal had been a better friend to him than we have." he said sadly defeated. He then moved to walk out the front door to thoughtfully watch the rapidly retreating figure.

I picked up the now partially braided length of hair and held it to me. Lowering my head I took in the scent that was so familiar. Memories of holding Duo, of loving him, rushed back to me and the enormity of what I had lost overwhelmed me. The other two sat quietly, lost in their own thoughts, as I held the braid to my face, tears falling unheeded.

"Fire!" Wufei's voice broke my train of thought as it called out the warning. Quatre and Trowa jumped to their feet. Trowa grabbed the extinguisher from under the kitchen sink, and they raced up the stairs as I hobbled behind them as quickly as I could on my wounded leg, the braid still clutched in my hand.

By the time I made it to Duo's room, the fire on the blackened bed was thoroughly doused by the fire retardant. Wufei picked through the smoldering, messy debris with the nozzle of his gun. His brows were drawn together.

"These are all Duo's things." He said as he continued to sift through the pile. "Here's his music, pictures, books. All the personal things he cares about." He reported

"Why wouldn't he take them with him?" Trowa queried.

Wufei's gun hit on a larger, melted surface. "His laptop." he said confused.

Quatre gasped, his eyes widened in horror. "No.....oh no." he said emotionally and trembling. We all turned to look at him alarmed. "We've got to stop him, Trowa." Quatre lunged at the Heavyarm's pilot, grabbing hold of his shirt front. "By Allah, Trowa.....he's going to...."

The blast that erupted from the woods and the shock that followed sent us all to the floor.

"The Alliance?" I asked alarmed from my prone position on the carpet.

"No!" Quatre cried out in agony. "Duo self-destructed!"

Somehow I got to my feet and stumbled out the door. I even managed to hobble across the field, ignoring the horrible pain in my thigh. 

The woods ahead of me were catching on fire and pieces of hot, black metal were littered across the ground and in the trees. I ventured into it's shade, regardless of the dangers, intent only on reaching the destroyed gundam and hoping against hope that he'd survived. I stopped suddenly, and looked down in horror on a burned and mostly dismembered body covered in tattered, black clothing that was melted onto the lifeless skin. The short brown hair was singed heavily and Duo's face was down in the dirt for which I'm now grateful for. I don't think I could have withstood the dreams of his burnt and ripped apart corpse accusing me with lifeless eyes. I moved forward blindly, trying to breathe through my sobbing when a grip around my chest stopped me.

"No, Heero. He's gone. Let's try not to remember him this way." Wufei held me tight as he whispered into my ear, crying unabashedly.

I turned around and melted into his arms and cried harder than I ever thought possible. All the emotions I'd held in check all my life crashed through the barrier that had been built up around me in my training. We both clung to each other and mourned Duo and our part in his death.

"We need to leave now." Trowa's voice sounded behind us, his tone firm and authoritative, he was clearly taking charge of the situation. "The authorities will be sure to send someone to investigate the explosion." he explained.

Wufei and I managed to separate but he held my shoulders in order to keep me turned away from Duo's tattered remains.

"We should bury him." I said as I struggled to compose myself.

"I'll take care of it." Trowa said, then suddenly, he looked down, studying something under his foot. Bending over, he picked the object up. It was Duo's crucifix, still on it's chain. Trowa's eyes closed as he gripped it in his hand, his quivering chin the only evidence of his grief. 

I looked at the abused metal as it dangled from Trowa's fingers. "I know I don't deserve it" I said. "but, may I have it?"

Trowa slowly opened his eyes and raised a dubious eyebrow.

"It will serve as a reminder of my mistake and the price paid for it. I'll not repeat such a mistake again." I promised.

Trowa nodded and carefully placed it in my hand. "Go quickly." he entreated us. "I'll take care of the remains. Pack only what you need. Quatre's already in Sandrock."

Wufei led me out of the forest as flames, surrounding Deathscythe's shattered hull, seemed to chase us out, angry that the tranquility of the forest had been violated by a senseless, violent death. We entered the safehouse for the last time, and I moved mechanically to gather my things, the cross and Duo's braid joined together in one fist as I worked in a blind haze.

It seemed that all of a sudden I came to my senses and found that I was in Wing, buckled in and beginning the fire up sequences. I didn't even recall leaving the safehouse, much less entering my gundam. My mind only registered that I was there at that moment and that my face was wet with tears. 

The coordinates of a new safehouse flashed onto my communications display screen. I knew I wouldn't be going there, too much guilt filled me to want to be with the others who were equally guilt ridden. Unknown to me at the time, the others felt the same. Even Trowa and Quatre separated. 

Quatre was right, writing this down has helped me, and I feel I may be ready to move forward, soon. Tears have dropped onto my keyboard as the memories have come back. Reaching over, I touch the braid on my desk lovingly. For some reason I need this reminder that I once had something beautiful. I might be ready to move on, but I will never forget. 

My hand goes to the cross around my neck that I'd repaired and polished. It will never be perfect again, but I prefer it that way. Duo had always chided me about my habitual drive to be the perfect soldier, but in doing that, I put that need ahead of my need for him. I am no longer the perfect soldier. I have been awakened to too many emotions to ever go back completely. Duo, in death, has continued to teach me. I now know what it is to have loved and to have lost. I can never be the perfect soldier again, and I think Duo would be happy for that. But I won't let the other people that I care for be lost to me for long. I'm going to contact Quatre and tell him that it's time, I want to come home. 

  
  


TBC

Next, The Chrysalid


	3. The Chrysalid, part 1

Note: A chrysalid is the same as a state of a chrysalis, the stage of a caterpillar where it turns into a butterfly.

The Chrysalid

Sequel to Duo's Demise

By Dyna Dee

Warnings: yaoi, angst, AU

A month after the news agencies reported the destruction of the notorious Gundam known as 02, David Miller stood in front of the brick administration building of the Woodward Public School in a suburb of Minneapolis, Minnesota. Taking a deep breath, he adjusted his smoke tinted glassed that completely covered his large and very distinguishable violet eyes. He stood gazing at the building dressed in perfectly pressed, pleated blue dress slacks, a white long-sleeved oxford shirt, and a briefcase in his hand. His straight, dark blonde hair was parted down the middle and fell just above his shoulders with only a fringe of hair over his forehead.

He smiled at the picture he purposely presented. He'd been startled himself by his recent transformation on several occasions when he caught sight of his reflection in store windows or mirrored surfaces. The change in hair color and style, and the opposite style of clothing than what he'd previously leaned toward, were important steps for his mental and physical transition to a new life. Today was the real beginning of that new life. With determination he took one step and then another and entered the building where he would build a new future, one that Sister Helen would be proud of.

A short time later he found himself sitting in the principal's office, his papers clutched securely in his slightly nervous hands as he faced the head of the school.

Mrs. Nelson was a woman in her late forties with slightly greying brown hair falling in loose curls around her shoulders and framing her small, slightly pointed face. Her blue eyes were enlarged by the thick glasses she wore, which slipped down the bridge of her nose when her head lowered even a fraction. "I see Mr. Miller, that you're an emancipated juvenile."

"Yes Mam." he replied respectfully

"Why is that?" she pushed her glasses back up the bridge of her nose to fully study the boy before her. 

"Its not from any inability to get along with my parents or rebelliousness." he began, getting her full attention. "My father was a career military man. He and my mother were killed in the attack on the Nairobi base eight months ago." He was rewarded by the shocked look on her face which was quickly replaced with a look of sympathy. 

"I was sent to live with my grandmother in St. Cloud." he went on to explain. "She's in her eighties and fell recently, breaking her hip and had to be put in a convalescent home. I was emancipated to relieve her from the burden of caring for me. I have a trust from my parents' life insurance policies and have a small apartment not far from school. I purposely chose to live here because of your school's excellent academic reputation."

He was pleased to see a look of appreciation on her face at his explanation. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the desk to peer at him from over the top rim of her glasses. "Do you have any specific goals in mind, Mr. Miller?" she asked.

"Academically, I would like to earn a scholarship and attend a high-ranking college. Personally," he continued, but lowered his voice, "I want to put the pain of my past behind me and make my own future." he replied truthfully.

Mrs. Nelson gave him an understanding smile and seemed pleased with the answer. She reached out her hand, silently asking to look at the papers in his hand. Her finely plucked eyebrows drew together as she absentmindedly pushed her glasses back to their proper position as she studied the information before her. "I don't see any school records here." She looked up for an explanation.

"My mother was a teacher." he explained. "Because we moved frequently, due to frequent transfers, she home schooled me. Any official records were lost in the attack on the base. I was hoping you could test me for placement in the proper classes." He smiled hopefully at her.

She nodded her head, her glasses falling forward again. "Very well." She rose from her chair. "Let me take you to the Counseling Office. Mr. Schmidt will be your counselor and will administer the tests. We'll start today and it should continue on through tomorrow. On Wednesday, we'll process the results and find you placement in the correct level of academic classes. You may stay home that day. Thursday, you'll start your new classes."

"Sounds great." the boy smiled and stood to follow. Mrs. Nelson's heart fluttered a bit at it. Underneath the nerd-like exterior, she recognized that this boy was extremely likeable and handsome.

On Thursday, David Miller found himself in Advance Placement Courses; including Advanced Physics, Calculus, Chemistry III, Economics II, World and Space History, and Physical Education.

He was content to stay to himself for a while, observing his fellow students. Watching them as he analyzed their behavior, got their names, and hacked into the school system to discover their grades and backgrounds. With careful study and deliberation, he chose four boys that he would attempt to befriend towards a future, working friendship, all according to his well thought-out plan.

Two of the boys he'd chosen were already friends, and he managed to sit next to them in several of his classes. He slowly eased his way into their conversations and was pleased to see he hadn't lost all his charm as the two, Mark Lile and Steven Hawkins, responded to him, and they quickly became friends. Though both were a bit nerdy for his former tastes, he had chosen them for their high academic records and their apparent lack of vices. It took a week or so for him to feel included as a friend, then David cultivated a friendship with the two other boys, Jeffrey Holland and Scott Ward, by using the same tactics. Slowly, he integrated the two pairs together. Each of the four boys had high grade-point averages and were in the advanced honors courses. Each excelled in different areas of academia.

David worked hard making up lost work so his semester grade would be complete. He met with the others several afternoons a week after school for fun and mostly to cement their growing friendship. By the end of the semester, the five were fast friends and, because of their advanced courses, their grade point averages were an easy 5.0. They celebrated in David's apartment with pizza and root beer floats.

As they sat in the living room of the modest two-room apartment, the other boys expressed their awe and envy for David's independence. He looked at them thoughtfully. "I'd give it all up in a minute to have a family like all of you have." he told them sincerely and his words immediately sobered the lively group. He'd previously told them the same story he'd told Mrs. Nelson of being an orphan. He wasn't really lying, he told himself as they looked at him in sympathy. He was an orphan and he'd lost a lot in his sixteen years. Enough that the pain was still evident in his eyes. He never knew if it was a silent or spoken agreement between his new friends, but they collectively agreed to nurture and protect their new, smaller friend. They would be a buffer, a cocoon for him against any that would harm him or remind him of his painful past.

Their bi-weekly gatherings after school began to turn from not only sessions for the strengthening of friendship with fun and laughter, but slowly David began to steer the other four into discussions regarding their future. He announced that he was taking a full load of classes at the Jr. College during the summer months and urged the others to join him. Mark, the tall redhead and Scott the curly, brown haired gregarious member of the group, balked at the idea. But David, with the aid of the auburn haired, freckle faced and slightly pudgy Steven and the blonde athlete, Jeffrey, talked them into joining them.

Assisted by the high school counselor, they registered for the summer semester and pre-selected classes. David announced his plans to challenge several courses to get credit without taking the time to take the courses that were required for graduation from college, and not necessary to the knowledge he wanted from a college institution. The idea appealed to the others as well, and they began to plan their academic future.

The conflict between Earth and the colonies raged on far from the school, and the five boys buried themselves deep into their studies. Discussions of the war and the Gundams, White Fang, or any other aspect of the war was eliminated from their conversation because it made David visibly uncomfortable. He knew the Gundams had gone into space, but refused to discuss any aspect of the war. It wasn't going to affect his life anymore, he told them.

Time passed quickly, the summer came and went with all five boys achieving their personal academic goals. When school began again in the fall, the five looked forward to their senior year. The four of the five had grown and changed dramatically since forming friendships and most people on campus gave credit to the quiet, small boy named David Miller. He tried not to draw attention to himself, but his appearance alone drew all eyes to him. The other four boys, all taller than David, seemed to surround him and protect him from any unwanted advances. They kept him safe and sheltered, something that was new to him. David often told them that he felt like he was in a state of chrysalis, feeling protected by their friendship while growing and changing to become something more fulfilling. They all agreed to feeling the same way.

Word of their intellect was widely known in the school community. Their grades, hard work, good natures, and friendliness became the banner of what the Woodward Public School represented. The entire school referred to the enviable group of five boys as the Think Tank Five, a name that stuck.

Following the advice of their counselor, the five planned on graduating from high school in January, having more than enough credits than what was required to graduate, and not seeing the need to wait for the extra five months to graduate with their classmates. For fun in the previous spring, they had all taken the SAT test that produced two perfect scores by David and Steven. The others trailed by only 10 to 15 points behind them.

College scholarships were offered the five by numerous colleges. After an intense meeting with school counselors and the four's parents, the five adamantly stood firm that they would attend the same school. They accepted full scholarships to Stanford University, room and board included. A large celebration was held at Steven's parents home in which more than half the school seemed to be in attendance. The families of all four boys were genuinely fond of their son's seemingly shy friend, David. They all, to some extent, realized that this small in stature young man had been the impetus for their sons motivation to excel in school and for their academic success. They welcomed all the boys into their homes regularly and David into their hearts.

There was a general atmosphere of happiness and sadness as the five graduated early from Woodward and immediately caught a plane to San Francisco.

The war in space came to a dramatic end as the leader of Oz was killed in battle with a Gundam, and Wing Zero dramatically saved the earth from a catastrophic disaster by destroying the enormous fragment of the space fortress Libra before it could crash into the earth. The five watched the television screen with the rest of the world as the events transpired. Steve elbowed Jeff and motioned towards David. The dark blonde haired boy had removed his ever present glasses, revealing his expressive blue/violet eyes. There was an anguish of soul displayed in them as he watched Wing fall backwards into the earth. As the falling piece of the large ship was destroyed, the four jumped to their feet cheering loudly, but stopped abruptly as they each noticed David as he buried his face in his hands and rocked back and forth. They quickly shut off the television and tried to comfort their friend, exchanging worried looks.

David returned to his normal self the next day. As in the past, he didn't push his friends to do more than they were capable of, but he set the example for them to follow, challenging courses he felt he could pass and taking at least 20 units a semester. Not having a place to go, he informed them that he would take a full load during the spring and summer semesters. The others decided to stay also.

In December of A.C. 197, the conflict with Diekem Barton began. Relena Dorilin Peacecraft had been kidnaped. David withdrew from the television and media news coverage to the growing conflict. As the world watched the events unfold, he delved into his studies.

Each of the five naturally branched into different majors. David majored in International Business and Economics. The now tall, redheaded Mark, majored in his favorite, Chemical Biology, Steven studied Engineering, and Jeffrey slipped easily into Business law. Scott did a double major in Marketing and Computer Science.

While everyone on Earth and on the colonies watched as Gundam Wing Zero blasted into the Barton Stronghold buried under the ground, David came up with his first joint invention. As a Think Tank, they put their heads and individual talents together to make David's idea come to life. The concept: eye glasses that displayed information from the computer. A new type of lens needed to be developed, one that you could clearly see out of, yet could display print on the inside. It needed a miniature transmitter to receive the information from the computer. Combing their abilities and talents, the five worked to produce a prototype. David came up with the initial financial backing needed to begin and surprisingly, most of the technical ideas. They developed a prototype, tested it, and leaking information to the business word in Silicon Valley, they sold their patented Comp-U-Wear glasses for fifty million dollars, with rights to future sales profits. The money was split evenly, five ways, each young man an instant multi-millionaire before they were out of their teens.

But the monetary success was as equally sensational as their overnight popularity. They became an instant public curiosity, a phenomenon. The business, scientific, and communication businesses were abuzz with word of the five wonders. Soon magazines, newspapers, and the visual media were clambering for the story of the Think Tank Five. The media went into a literal frenzy when it was discovered that they were eighteen and nineteen year-old college students.

Their overnight success posed a major problem for the five. David refused to be interviewed or photographed. He didn't want to be in the public eye, and he was adamant and very agitated about the whole situation, much to the puzzlement of his friends. Gratefully, the university agreed to use it's security to keep the media away from the campus and from obtaining any academic or personal information regarding their famous students.

Jeff called a meeting several weeks later, announcing a solution. They all met in his new home in Palo Alto and awaited for the pizza to be delivered.

"Okay Jeff," David smiled warmly while looking up at his tall, blonde friend. "What's up, other than you four?" He chuckled as he noted the physical changes in his friend, and then the changes in all of them since they first met. They were all taller then he was, but then, so was just about everybody. Jeff had grown to be six feet tall, and was muscular from his weekend racket ball and basketball games. Gone from all of them were the nerd looks. Money and his own gentle suggestions for hair and fashion, plus the aura of success each bore, had turned awkward boys into handsome young men, each with an inner confidence that radiated from them. They all had women chasing them, attracted to their good looks and new found fame and money. David smiled pleasantly as he thought of the happiness the group shared. Jeff and Mark were both engaged. Their fiances were beautiful, intelligent girls who fit well into the Five. He was happy for them.

"I want you to meet someone and to keep an open mind" Jeff said as soon as the five sat in his living room. "I think we could hire this guy to pose as David for public pictures and functions, a decoy of sorts." Jeff paused a moment seeing various expressions on his friend's faces, from disbelief to curiosity and doubt. He continued on. "Listen, this guy could use the money, and if he passes your approval, we could train him to answer questions and just keep him in the background as the shy member of the group."

The doorbell rang and Jeff turned to answer the door. "Pizza." he announced with a smile and left the room. A moment later, he returned, the pizza guy in tow with three large pizzas and a couple of six packs of Coke.

"Hey guys, meet Ted." The young man in question looked uncomfortable, but gave a wide, generous smile. He was small in build, had light brown hair that poked out from under his Pizzeria Hat, and large brown eyes that reflected that his smile was genuine.

Everyone said hello, and Steve looked under the brim of the delivery boy's hat. "Mind taking off your hat?" he asked.

Perplexed, the young man hesitated, then slowly reached up and removed it to reveal a full head of thick, straight, light brown hair.

"What do you think David?" Jeff asked, seeming very pleased with himself.

All eyes in the room turned to the dark blonde who studied the newcomer in serious contemplation. David was still the smallest of the group at 5'6", and as slender as a young boy, appearing younger than his 19 years. He looked relatively the same as in high school, his hair was still dark blonde, straight and shoulder length, and he still wore tinted glasses, effectively hiding his unforgettable violet eyes, though the others suggested he have had laser surgery to correct his vision. His face had thinned a bit as he got older, and it was a bit more angular now. He seemed to smile more now than ever, and appeared his happiest when surrounded by his friends. 

But even after all the time they had known him, he still had an air of sadness that seemed to descend on him at odd, quiet times. To the other four, their friend seemed lonely and often melancholy. All attempts to set David up with dates had been discouraged. When Scott sat down to talk to him about it, David told him he had been in love once, before he met them, and was hurt so badly that he found it hard to trust again. He assured him that after college he would think about becoming more social and maybe even try dating. Scott had informed the others of their conversation, and all attempts to set David up ceased. 

"Well," David studied the young man before him. "I can see a slight resemblance."

"Here, try this." Jeff took the glasses from off of David's face and put them on Ted. All five hummed and nodded their heads approvingly. There was a similarity, but anyone would be hard pressed to match David's good looks.

"Ah.....can I ask what's going on here?" Ted asked nervously, the three pizzas still in his hands.

Mark stepped forward and took the pizzas out of his hands as David answered. "Well Ted, we're looking for a business associate. Would you mind sitting down and telling us about yourself?" he asked and motioned for the delivery boy to take a seat on the leather couch.

The pizza guy looked at the expectant faces surrounding the shortest guy in the room and saw that they were serious. He was never one to pass up an opportunity, or at least listen to one. He sat at the indicated spot and waited for the others to sit before he began his story.

He started by telling them that he had dropped out of high school when he was a senior, that was when his father had died of cancer and he needed to get a job to help support his mother. He worked at the Pizza Place and saved his money in hopes of buying the franchise one day. 

The five then proceeded to explain who they were and asked him questions that were a little more personal in nature; what he did in his off time, did he drink, smoke, or do drugs? They were up front with him that, if hired, he needed to have a clean record and live his life in a way that was beyond reproach. They explained that, if the job was offered, he would be representing David in public, as the small blonde wished to maintain his privacy, even though the public was clambering for more details. He would in effect, be a decoy, and paid very, very well for doing a good job.

After the questions were asked, they asked him to wait in the kitchen so that the five could discuss the situation in private. Five minutes later, the high school dropout was offered the job of a lifetime.

Within a month, pictures of the Think Tank Five were published in ten major magazines along with their individual stories. David's story began with the day he entered Woodward.

Together, they graduated at the age of twenty-one and far ahead of schedule. They set up business together in Los Angeles. David coordinated the work and headed Research and Development. In a short time they developed a fool-proof, anti-theft device for automobiles, a portable, invisible personal force shield designed for police forces, political dignitaries, and celebrities who might have concern for their personal safety and could afford the costly form of protection. They also developed an in-ground guidance system for automobiles that would follow a tracking system in the pavement, allowing the car to be programed to its destination, permitting the driver to work or sleep while commuting or traveling. Sensors strategically placed around the vehicle were developed to detect cars or objects around it and fed the data into the car's computer, instantly adjusting the speed or applying the brakes. After testing and tweaking it into perfection, the system was found fool proof. The projected sales were in the billions as governments and car companies endorsed the system and began to implement it.

Life was very good indeed for the TTF and their silent partner.

******

Quatre Rabbara Winner, head of the Winner Corporation, tossed down the latest Time Magazine, followed by the Business Weekly and Who's Who in the World Magazine, plus several others. Each cover showed the same group of five young men on their cover in various poses, The Think Tank Five, or the TTF as they were commonly referred to. This group of young geniuses were responsible for world-changing inventions, self-made billionaires before the age of twenty-one.

Quatre's personal investigator picked up the discarded magazines and studied them.

"I'm thinking of contacting these guys to talk about a combined business venture." Quatre began.

"But you want to know more about them before the first contact?" The other asked as he leafed through the Who's Who Magazine.

The blonde smiled. "You know me so well."

The other smirked. "You and all your sordid secrets."

"Me? Sordid secrets?" The blond replied feigning umbrage as he sat back and leaned into his comfortable chair.

"Well, let's see," The other leaned forward. "a runaway at fifteen, a secret male lover since you were sixteen, a Gundam pilot, engineer of Wing Zero, and embarrassingly bested and wounded by a girl with a sword in a duel." 

"No fair." the blonde pouted. "You're hitting below the belt."

"Sorry," the other sat back with a wicked smile. "That's Trowa's job.

"Very funny." The head of Winner Corporation stuck his tongue out at his friend. He then shrugged and leaned forward again. "Anyway, there are five of these guys, all living in Los Angeles. From what the articles say, they are very close, having gone to school together and planned their careers as a team. Find out the usual, their habits, any vices, or if they pose any working liabilities, their backgrounds, assets, what their employees think about them, and anything else you may think is pertinent."

"Alright." the other stood and picked up all the magazines. "I'll leave tomorrow and report in every couple of days. It might take me a couple of weeks to do a proper surveillance since there are five of them."

The head of the Winner Corporation stood and moved from behind his desk and embraced the taller man. "Hurry back Heero, we'll miss you."

"Thanks Quatre. Tell Trowa I'll see him when I get back."

"Will do. And you might give Wufei a call at the Preventer's Office. He might have additional information on the TTF, and would be offended if you went to Earth and didn't get in touch."

"Alright." The Japanese man easily agreed.

"And be careful."

"Yes, mother." Heero teased. "But I don't think those five look like they would pose any danger to me." Heero scoffed at the idea. He ducked as Quatre took off his expensive loafer from off his foot and playfully threw it at him, missing completely. 

TBC


	4. The Chrysalid, part 2

The Chrysalid

By: Dyna Dee

Part 2

Warnings: yaoi

Heero Yuy, Savior to the World, as some people had labeled him after the wars, now lay dressed all in black and on his belly, hidden behind the arch of a residential roof that bordered the subject's home. With binoculars in hand as well as a tracking device, he awaited to activate his homing beacon to begin his routine surveillance for the day. Wisely biding his time, he once again flipped though the files he'd gotten from Wufei regarding the individual members of the Think Tank Five. The files were remarkably small and of little consequence. They included the five's individual academic accomplishments, records of admissions to Stanford University, copies of patents, filed income tax records, donations to charities, etc. They were unbelievably the most upstanding group of young men he'd ever encountered, and none of them seemed to have any major vices. Two were married, one with a child, and both with children on the way. Another was dating an actress, (maybe that could be considered a vice) and the other two had live-in girlfriends. Each lived in high security mansions in or near L.A. with body guards cautiously watching their backs. They each had separate offices in the large and well guarded TTF building in downtown L.A, though worked closely together and got along as best friends. Amazingly, even the girlfriends and wives all seemed to get along.

Heero scratched his head in wonder and disbelief. There had to be something wrong. Nothing and no one was this perfect. He looked at their photos from high school and then to the magazine photos. Somehow, these awkward, gangly nerds were transformed into successful, poised, mature, and accomplished businessmen. They attributed their success to David Miller, the soft spoken and shy one of the group. After he had transferred to their high school in his junior year, he had befriended and united them as a group. Heero contemplated that statement. David had been much like Quatre had been for the gundam pilots during the war; uniting and quietly, gently leading them. Looking at the high school picture of David, he felt strangely drawn to the bespeckled boy. He had a heart shape face and nice mouth. They reminded him of.....NO!, he clamped down on his mind, he wouldn't go to that old wound. It still hurt. The boy's face had made a lot of changes over the years. The present picture of David Miller showed a young man with similar and ever present tinted glasses, his hair now a darker, light brown, and cut shorter, and his face had become more angular. It made him look quite different, but similar. 

Positioned on black shingles of the home that was left vacant during the day, he again took up his binoculars. David Miller was his last surveillance and report to turn in. In fact, he was probably the most important one of the group, the apparent leader of the five.

He sighed deeply, he'd been in L.A. for a month now on this assignment and he was anxious to return home to L4. Living like this, hidden as much as possible from other peoples' eyes and staying in various hotel rooms reminded him too much of the war. A time a place he didn't care to revisit in mind or body.

The front door opened and Heero marked the departure time in his log. Mr. Miller dressed in a suit and tie, and his girlfriend, Suzie Martin, also dressed in office wear, walked to the chauffeur driven Mercedes waiting a few feet from his front door steps and entered the open back door. A live-in body guard followed closely behind, his eyes scanning the area before he got in the front passenger side of the car. The security gate opened and they drove out. The tag he'd slipped on the car traced the car's route.

He began to pack up his equipment to follow them yet again, when he detected a new movement at the back of the house. From out of what he'd determined to be a guest house stepped another young man, one he hadn't observed before. He had shoulder length, dark blonde hair and wore sun glasses. He watched as the small-in-stature young man, he determined to be in his late teens or early twenties, stretched his lean form lazily and walked towards the large lap pool wearing mid-thigh length swim trunks and a large red towel wrapped around his neck. With his back to Heero's position, the young man drew the towel from around his neck and tossed it onto one of the deck chairs. He then removed his glasses and put on a pair of goggles. Heero appreciated the view of the slender, muscular form of the swimmer as he paused for just a moment before diving into the clear blue water. He wondered if this person was a guest or an employee. He glanced down at his tracker to acknowledge the Mercedes was heading downtown, in the direction it had taken for the last three days, straight to the TTF Corporate Headquarters. 'Boring.' he thought to himself. This guy was not only clean cut and above the board good, he was also predictable to the minute. Turning his attention back to the figure swimming gracefully in the pool, he realized that the guy was in pretty good shape as he swam lap after lap almost effortlessly. Despite being on the job, his interest was piqued as was his curiosity.

He watched until the laps were finished and the lean, tan body emerged gracefully from the water to pad over to the towel. The goggles were removed and the sunglasses were replaced. As he toweled off, Heero got a good view of the other. He determined that he was roughly 5'5" -5'6" in height. His strong, but not overly muscular shoulders tapered down to a very trim waist and slender hips. He had the typical California tan and radiated good health and vitality.

With the towel draped over his shoulder, he turned to approach the house, keyed in the entry code on a security panel to the right of the door, and entered.

Heero waited for a moment, his scanner showing the Mercedes had arrived at the TTF building on time. He could afford to wait a bit longer.

Two hours later, the back door opened and the young man exited. To Heero's surprise, he was fully dressed in jeans and a loose royal blue cotton shirt. His hair was dry and brushed and he carried a large armful of what looked to be clean laundry. Through his binoculars, the P.I. could see a resemblance between this person and David Miller. He frowned and opened the Miller file. He was an orphan, and an only child whose parents had been killed during the attack on the Nairobi military base during the first war. His only relative had been a grandmother who had died shortly after he entered Woodward. Heero inwardly winced as once again, the realities of war sat up and bit him on the ass. War had made David Miller an orphan, like so many others.

But who was this guy if not a relative?

He watched for the rest of the day as the object of his curiosity moved freely about the property. He cleaned the pool, read a couple of magazines, the studied several thick manilla folders and took notes on a legal-size pad of paper as he sat in a lounge chair on the cement deck. He took a break for lunch, which he prepared in the main house, then washed one of the cars from in the garage while rock music played from a portable music system.

Around five p.m. he entered the main house again and, through the open windows, Heero watched him as he moved about the kitchen efficiently and with familiarity as he began to prepare dinner. 

Was he the resident chef?

At six thirty, the Mercedes promptly pulled up and into the open garage. The three who left that morning had returned, right on schedule. Once again through the window, Heero watched them enter and warmly greet and embrace the smaller man. Even the body guard smiled and talked at ease with him. If he was on the payroll, he wasn't just an ordinary cut-of-the-mill employee.

Still watching them, Heero observed the four as they sat and took their meal together. Ms. Martin did the dishes and the bodyguard went to his room. David and the other young man talked in the living room for an hour before the blonde stood and waved goodnight with a smile and left the house. Heero watched his fluid, almost graceful movements as he walked around the pool in the moonlight. He settled himself into a lounge chair and raised his arms above his head, pillowing it as he lay back completely to apparently study the stars above. He lay there for a good half hour before rising and returning to the cottage. An hour later, his lights went out, and the bluish light coming from some of the upper uncovered windows was evidence of his television being on.

Heero stood and popped his aching joints. He felt foolish at having watched this person all day. Something about him was intriguing, almost....compelling. He hadn't felt drawn to or curious about a person like this since..... 'No, not there', he reprimanded himself before his thoughts could go back to that painful time and place.

He silently left the roof top and the neighbor's yard, easily avoiding any detection from the newly arrived inhabitants. Walking down the street, several blocks to his car, he decided to pick up some food from a fast food drive-through, then took it to his nearby motel and tried to put his feelings and questions away for the night.

He found himself back at the Miller house the next four days, silently castigating himself for the unexplained and growing fascination he felt for the pool guy, or whatever he was. It was a puzzle, and he just couldn't quite figure it out. He wasn't a relative, nor an employee, he decided. At least he didn't think so, and yet each day, his living pattern stayed relatively the same as the first day. The main variation was after his morning swim, he would stay in the Miller house for as little as two hours, and sometimes up to six. He ate, laughed with the others in the main house, and seemed friendly and completely at home. In fact, as he continued to watch the interaction between the four inhabitants of the house, he got the impression that Mr. Miller valued this person's opinion as he stopped, listened intently to whatever he said, and nodded his head respectfully to what the blonde said to him. It seemed that David Miller held this person in high esteem.

Heero's curiosity had finally gotten the best of him. He felt frustrated that he couldn't figure out the dynamics of the relationships viewed through the binoculars. This led him to the decision that, in the morning, he was going to go in, using his well-honed stealth skills and get to the bottom of this mystery.

On the morning of the fifth day, Heero breeched the excellent security system and hid behind some bushes that lined the fence in the back area of the house. The swimmer had risen earlier and Miss Martin stuck her head out of the door before leaving. "Do you need anything from the store, David?" she asked.

"We're out of ice cream and chips." was his melodic reply as he turned to face her, his goggles already in place. "Get the kettle kind, not barbequed." 

'Damn,' thought Heero. 'He even has a great tenor voice.'

"Okay, I'll pick some up on the way home." she smiled. "See you at six thirty."

"K" he answered with a wave and then turned and dove into the water to begin his laps. As usual, he swam for a half hour before emerging. 

Heero was close enough to hear the swimmer's heavy breathing from his exertions. 'Hum, his name is David also.', he silently contemplated that fact. Then, as he turned from toweling off, the former Wing Zero pilot caught a momentary glimpse of the other's eyes before the glasses were put in their place. He had the most beautiful, large eyes. Heero's heart skipped a beat. Even though he couldn't see the color of those magnificent orbs, those eyes brought back memories, painful memories of another's eyes. He had never in his life seen another person with eyes similar to Duo's. Once again, his heart ached for his lost love.

This David now had the towel draped over his head to catch the drips as he entered the house, not needing to key in the security code as Miss Miller had already opened it.

Unable to stop himself, Heero, with great stealth, made his way over to the cottage and entered the unlocked door, knowing from the last four day's pattern that the pool guy wouldn't return for several hours. He scanned the room with eyes that naturally caught every detail. The cottage was a cozy studio apartment. On the left hand wall, A dark blue leather couch with a soft, light blue angora knitted afghan draped over it faced the opposite wall containing a large, state of the art, big screen tv, and situated on both sides of the couch was an enormous, obscenely expensive stereo system. Against the far wall was a neatly made queen-size bed, with a cherry wood headboard. The dresser inside the open closet to the right of the bed matched the headboard in wood and style. A door to the left of the bed obviously had to be the bathroom

Quickly moving to the closet, Heero shuffled through the drawers, finding neatly folded clothes filling them. On the shelves above the hanging shirts and pants, were photo albums. Taking them down, he quickly flipped through them. Most of them had pictures of the Think Tank Five in high school and college, minus David Miller as an adult in all but the most recent photos. Yet in many of the photos was the handsome pool David. Heero noticed the room's occupant and David Miller always wore dark tinted glasses, obscuring their eyes from view.

Suddenly, Heero got it. He slapped his forehead in realization, and groaned for not having seen it in the first place. The pool David was in fact, David Miller. He looked almost the same now as he had in his high school photo, just older. But why the subterfuge? 'Probably to keep his privacy.' Heero thought. The guy living in the house and who had appeared in all the publicity photos and in group interviews was a decoy. 

Very clever.

He quickly leafed through the other photo albums showing the five at various activities. But the album on the bottom of the stack was different from the other two. It was a scrap book. The first half contained the first newspaper and magazine articles on the TTF and their accomplishments a accolades, but the last half was filled with clippings from the war, specifically, reports and pictures of the gundams and their pilots. Heero stared at the photos of he and the other pilots that had been taken right after the major battles. They were unauthorized ones, but there was always a media photographer trying to get a picture of the kids who piloted the legendary Gundams. Those few pictures were cut out and placed carefully in the memory book. 'Odd.' he thought and closed the books, replacing them on the shelf exactly as he had found them. 'He must be a war buff.' he thought.

Finding nothing further of interest, he left the cottage and, taking a chance at being caught, silently entered the back door to the main house. He could hear voices and cautiously followed the sound. The voices came from an open doorway. He recognized several of them from his earlier surveillance as he inched closer to stand just next to the door frame, his back against the wall, and his body poised for a silent but hasty retreat if the room's occupant made a more towards him. Taking a small rectangled mirror out of his pocket, he angled to get a view of the room.

"Where's Jeff?' the David in the room asked.

"He just got in." Steve reported. "I think the baby was sick last night."

"Morning guys. Sorry I'm late, David." the cheerful voice of Jeff greeted them as his face popped up on one of the blank screens, his face joining the others on the media wall.

Turning the mirror, his eyes widened at the site of the communications room. The wall opposite his position was fully lined with monitors. Five of them were lit up with the familiar faces of the TTF, including the David decoy.

"Is the baby sick, Jeff?" David in the room asked concerned.

The blonde on the screen nodded. "Yeah, Marilyn and I had to take her to the emergency room, she has an ear infection. I picked up her medicine this morning, that's why I'm late."

"I think you should go home, Jeff." David replied. "I'm sure you and Marilyn are tired and in her condition, she could probably use your help at home.

"Thanks, David. I think I will after this meeting."

"Good. Anything we can do to help?"

"No, but remember the party on Friday. We're expecting all of you plus your dates. And that means you David." he gave the blonde a piercing glare.

"We'll see, but no promises."

"Come on David." Steve chimed in gently, half teasingly. "It's been years since your heart was broken. You said after college you'd get a life. We'd be happy to set you up with someone, you recluse."

"No thanks." David laughed, and a chill went up Heero's spine for an unknown reason at the sound of it. "I'll date when I'm ready. Now lets get down to business." He reached over and picked up some papers from the desk, then turned back to face the camera that transmitted his face to the others. "Mark, let's hear how your meeting went yesterday with the scientists."

As the four reported on each of their departments, Heero trained his mirror on the real David Miller and listened as he directed the dialog. He clearly was the mastermind behind the TTF. He still wore his trunks and was combing his hair as he listened. As he turned, Heero noticed a long scar down his right thigh and one on his left shoulder. Heero's brows furrowed as something in the back of his mind tried to reach for something, a memory, or a recollection.

Scott began his report on the patents pending on several new products. "I heard from one of my contacts that Quatre Winner is putting feelers out to us. Sounds like he's interested in a business venture in space. Could be a good way..."

"NO!" David said firmly, shocking the others as he leaned over to grip the table in front of him as if to steady himself.

"Are you alright David?" several of the other asked, concerned.

"I don't want to pursue any business connection with the Winner Corporation."

"Why, David?" Jeff asked, clearly puzzled. "They run an outstanding organization and it's the perfect opening for us into the colonies."

David shook his head, not looking at the others, but his eyes were focused on the pattern of the wood grain on his desk. "I can't explain it." David said nearly hyperventilating. "But, I can't trust Quatre......I promised I'd never trust him again." he said so softly the others had to strain to hear him.

"How do you know Quatre Winner?" Mark asked, astonished that the man they knew was already acquainted with someone as famous as the head of the Winner Corporation. When did this happen?

David looked up at his friends, pain was written on his face. "I told you I ran from a painful experience once....he was part of it."

"DUO?" a strained and shocked voice sounded behind him and startled, David whipped himself around to see the last person in the world he ever thought he'd see again in his life. Shock and fear registered in his own wide eyes.

Heero Yuy staggered into the media room, his eyes were wide in disbelief and wonder. "Duo?" he asked again in a disbelieving whisper as all the pieces came together and fit.

"Oh, God Heero. How'd you find me?" David asked horrified at the approaching figure. He jumped at Heero's sudden movement, expecting the worse, but instead, found himself enveloped in Heero Yuy's arms.

"DAVID!" Five voices cried out in alarm at what looked to be an intruder attack. "Alert Security!" Scott shouted. Chaos erupted on the vid screens as Heero held the person he'd thought was lost to him forever.

"Forgive me, Duo. Forgive me. I didn't know, couldn't understand back then. I've missed you so much, we all have. Forgive us." Heero was weeping, Duo realized. Something he never thought the former Wing Zero pilot capable of. Slowly, his arms raised up of their own volition and embraced the shaking form of his former teammate and lover.

"Heero." he whispered softly.

Finally the shouting behind him registered and he pulled himself out of Heero's embrace and turned back to the screen to see the horrified expressions on his friends' faces. "It's okay guys. Call off the dogs. I'm safe......at least, I think I am. Heero?" he raised a questioning brow.

"Never safer, Duo." was the soft reply from the slightly dazed looking Japanese young man that David would have recognized anywhere. Heero was taller, at 5'10". He was still muscular, yet as handsome as anyone David had ever seen. His heart skipped a beat, but in recognizing it, he quelled it. There were many question to ask and answer before even a friendship could resume.

His face frowned. "It's David now, Heero." the blonde corrected the mistake. "Duo Maxwell died at the age of sixteen of a broken heart. He doesn't exist any longer. I'm David Miller."

Heero nodded, willing to give into anything Duo requested. He was alive.

David turned to the screens, addressing his stunned friends. "Guys, this is an old friend, pre-Woodward days." He explained. "If you don't mind, we'll continue with our meeting tomorrow. I'm fine, don't worry about me. My friend and I are going to catch up. All right?"

Slowly the others agreed and, one by one, the monitors went blank.

Turning around to face his past, amethyst eyes met cobalt blue. "Let's go to the living room, Heero. This is probably going to take a while, so we might as well be comfortable." The two talked for the remainder of the day, stopping only to let David dress and fix lunch. Afterwards, they moved from the living room to the side of the pool.

David explained why he had faked his death and how he had done it. He was surprised that Hero understood. So much had changed. The emotionless, perfect soldier that displayed little to no such human weaknesses such as emotion or compassion during the time he had known him, now laughed, cried, expressed regret and sorrow, as well as humor and joy.

Heero explained that on the day Duo died, his heart broke free of the wall his training had created. It opened a world of emotion to him. With the help of the others, he became more human.

"How are the others?" David asked hesitantly, and Heero filled him in on their lives, their reactions and separation after Deathscythe's destruction. He told him that currently Wufei was a Preventer and engaged to Dr. Sally Poe. Trowa and Quare had come together again after the war and seemed to be very happy. He had even managed to make a friend of Relena. He had convinced her that there was no future for them together and even he confided in her of their love affair, and the reasons behind Deathscythe's destruction and his lover's death. There was a long pause of silence between the two before David looked up into Heero's searching eyes.

"Are you happy, Heero?"

Heero shrugged. "I suppose I'm happy enough. I work for Quatre as his Private Detective. I investigate future business prospects for him, which, consequently, led me to you. I enjoy the friendship of the others, but happy?" He seemed to pause and contemplate the concept. "I'd say I'm content with my life." he finally answered.

"Any one special to share your life with?" David felt his cheeks pinking under his tan skin.

"No. " he shook his head. "I've carried the guilt of your death around like a weight about my neck. I haven't been able to form any meaningful relationships, other than that of a family with the other guys."

"I'm sorry, Heero." The honesty of the statement surprised the former pilot even as he said it. He was sorry. 

"How about you, Mr. Billionaire." Heero offered a crooked smile. "From the sound of the conversation I overheard, you haven't even dated."

"I have my friends and my work. It's been enough."

"We're pretty sad, aren't we?" Heero smirked sadly. "Both emotional cripples from my stupidity. Honestly Duo....David." he corrected. "Back then, I didn't comprehend that I was doing anything but following my emotions. I got involved with Wufei only because he seemed to need me and out of my curiosity with him. I somehow got feelings of friendship mixed up with the new feelings that I'd experienced with you. I didn't understand the distinction of love for a friend, and that of a lover. I never dreamed I would hurt you like that."

David shook his head. "I loved too young, too much, and too foolishly." he said it aloud for the first time. "And, I over reacted." he admitted. "Not that I didn't have reason to be angry and hurt." He added quickly. But over the years as he reflected on those events, he realized that he, too, played a part in what had happened. It wasn't all Heero's fault. He knew of his lover's limitations, and his lack of understanding his newly found emotions. It had just been too overwhelming at the time, and he didn't know how to forgive such inflicted pain, intentional or not.

"Can you forgive me?" Heero asked solemnly, search the eyes now free of their glasses. 

"I did years ago, Heero." David replied, his eyes soft with honesty. "Part of Duo Maxwell dying was letting go of all the pain I felt. I did let it all go, and only then could I see things much more clearly. I eventually forgave all of you, but I couldn't return to the war or to you guys. I had destroyed Deathscythe, and honestly, my heart just wasn't in it anymore. I was too hurt by all that had happened and I knew that if I returned I would die, and I had promised Sister Helen that I would live and make something of my life." he gave a wistful smile. "I think I've done that."

Heero nodded and made a bold move, he took the other's hand in his and looked up into the eyes he could never forget. "Can we be friends again?" he asked with shy hope. "I've missed you, and just being here today has helped heal a part of me I thought was beyond repair."

David smiled softly, his hand squeezing the one firmly holding his. "Me too." he sighed and closed his eyes as he relished the feel of Heero's hand, and the feeling of freedom he suddenly felt of being liberated from all he'd held inside for so long. A weight seemed to have lifted from off his shoulders at finally speaking of the past, at last. He sighed deeply then answered. "Lets see how I sleep tonight, see if the nightmares return." He withdrew his hand from Heero's and opened his eyes and continued. "My one condition for a possible continued friendship is that you don't tell the others you found me. I'm not ready for them to know yet. Let's wait and see how we get along first before we involve them. Can you agree to that Heero?"

The former lover and soldier thoughtfully considered the request. He was torn between wanting to be with Duo again and the desire to share the wonderful discovery with the others that Duo was alive, that they hadn't been responsible for his death after all, that they no longer need to be haunted by the memory of the pain etched on Duo's face the day he faced them with his accusations, the day he detonated Deathscythe. 

But Duo wasn't ready.

"Yes. I can keep it between you and I until you're ready for them to know." he agreed, a smile slowly forming on his face.

David returned the smile with a brilliant one of his own, relieved and happy that Heero would choose to make such a difficult concession on his behalf. "Then stay for dinner and meet some of my friends."

Heero happily agreed. He stayed in L.A. much longer than he had anticipated, attending the party on Friday as David's guest and meeting in person all the young men he had recently investigated. If they were shocked that David brought a date that was of the same gender, the were almost catatonic when later that night, the both of them sat with the other five as Duo told them of his life prior to meeting them. All in all, the disclosure went well, with a little time needed to adjust their minds around who their friend really was. And they did, quite well and very quickly. He was their friend and leader no matter what, and they didn't hesitate to reconfirm that fact to him.

It was another three weeks before Heero reluctantly returned to space and handed his favorable and edited report to his boss. 

TBC

next: Commencement


	5. Commencement

Commencement

By Dyna Dee

Warnings: yaoi, mild

One year after The Chrysalid.

Quatre R. Winner reached up to readjust his taller companion's tie.

"It's fine Quatre, just leave it be." Trowa complained quietly. His patience was being tried at his lover's unusual fidgeting.

"Sorry." the blonde apologized, knowing he was irritating the other. "I'm just nervous." He looked around the large room slowly filling with important people from the colonies and Earth. Relena had asked him to host this ball to celebrate the success of the Earth/Space Alliance. The people in this room had worked and fought hard to build a lasting peace and the former Queen of the World thought that they should bond together not only in work, but in a more relaxed arena as friends. What better way to do that than attending large social events a couple of times a year?

This was the second such party the President of the Winner Corporation had hosted. It was a ball with a private, more personal reception before hand for about 200 select friends of the Peacecrafts and Winners. The room was filling up with happy people.

"Everything has been taken care of." Trowa reassured him with a gentle smile lighting his face. "Trust your staff to see that it goes smoothly."

Quatre's hand snaked up and affectionately stroked the back of the black tuxedo his lover wore. "I do, but that's not what I'm worried about."

Trowa's eyebrows rose in question, but over the blonde's head he recognized a newcomer to the reception. "Wufei's here." he announced calmly.

Quatre whipped around with an enormous smile gracing his face. "Wufei!" he called out and waved his arm vigorously signaling the Chinese man over.

The former Sandrock pilot saw Wufei's nod of recognition and the roll of his eyes at his excited outburst in see his friend again. It was always so easy to get a reaction out of Wufei. Quatre watched as he approached them and appreciated the picture Wufei presented. He wore black dress pants and a short silk jacket with a mandarin collar. It was decorated with elaborate black frog closures on the front. His black waist-length braided hair seemed to disappear against the black outfit. He noted once again the 5' 10" height his friend had acquired, the same as Heero. The blonde sighed. He was cursed to be the smallest of the group at 5' 8", and though he had put on some weight since the wars, he was still considered small by the others.

He leaned against Trowa. His lover was the tallest of the former pilots at 6', his body was fit and muscular, much like Heero and Wufei, who worked at keeping their bodies strong. Quatre decided he as just too busy and maybe a tad too lazy to work that hard.

The Chinese man stopped in front of them, greeting then with a simple nod of his head, then looked sternly into the blonde's eyes. "All right, Winner. What was so important that I had to come to this stuffed-shirt party." He demanded to know, though his eyes sparkled with affection for the two he addressed.

"Heero requested we all be here." Quatre answered.

"Heero?" Wufei looked genuinely surprised. "I've hardly seen or heard from him this year, other than our wedding. Even then, it was highly peculiar and notably rude for the best man to excuse himself in the middle of the reception to catch a plane to meet someone, I think he said in Los Angeles. What's he up to?"

Quatre recognized the curious look on both men's faces, and felt smugly satisfied that he knew something they didn't, though it was still very little. "Heero's bringing a date. Someone he's anxious for us to approve of." He paused to let his words sink in, then he dropped the big one. "He's in love." 

Wufei looked like he'd swallowed this tongue, and Trowa looked.....shocked.

"Are you sure? When did this happen?" Trowa asked

Quatre nodded, pleased again with his surprise. "Heero came to my office three days ago, before he left for Earth. He asked me to make sure everyone would be here tonight as he was bringing someone special. Of course, I questioned him about who it was, but you know how tight lipped he can be." The other two nodded. Satisfied, he continued. "He didn't exactly tell me, but said he'd met someone a year ago and has been courting....," he eyes twinkled as the other two listening intently raised dubious eyebrows. "Yes, he actually said courting this person since then. This is their public debut."

"Male or female?" Trowa asked.

The blonde shrugged. "He was very careful not to say. He just told me this is the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with, and he hoped we would be open to accepting this person. Evidently, they are both nervous about our approval."

Wufei frowned. "Why would Heero worry about that? We're an easy going, accepting kind of group."

Trowa snickered. "Which is why we have so many close friends." The four former Gundam pilots worked well the others, but really felt comfortable only around each other. They grudgingly accepted Sally, but she had worked with them during the war and her ability to bring happiness and peace to Wufei had earned her a rare place in the acceptance of her into their odd little family. Now Heero was about to introduce another. Trowa understood his friend's nervousness. If they didn't take to the person he loved,.....it would be difficult.

"We will keep an open mind, right guys? Give this person a fair chance?" Quatre asked, and was pleased to see both men nod their heads in agreement.

"Speaking of friends." Trowa spoke up and turned to face Wufei. "Where's Sally?"

Now it was Wufei's turn to know something the others didn't. "She's at home." he replied.

"She was invited to attend." Quatre said frowning. "She's not put out with us is she?" He worried, having so many sisters, he knew how easily some women could be hurt or take offense.

"No." Wufei scoffed at the idea. "She hasn't been feeling well and I didn't want her to take any chance."

"Chances?" Quatre asked, curiosity piqued.

"She's pregnant." Wufei announced, a sly grin on his face.

Quatre launched himself at his friend, tightly embracing him. "That's wonderful Wufei!" he said with great enthusiasm and pounding his back. When at last he was released, Trowa offered his firm handshake and a broad smile in congratulations.

Just as they were about to get into the when and how-long questions, Trowa alerted them to Heero's entrance into the room.

********* 

Heero and David barely made it in time for the reception before the ball. They'd entered the hotel from the private garage, and were directed to the Winner suites. Each having their own room and separating, rushed to dress into the more formal clothing the dressy affair demanded. Heero leaned against the wall opposite David's door, dressed and patiently waiting for David's exit from his room. As the doorknob turned, he straightened in anticipation.

"Do I look ok?" David asked as he emerged from his room and shut the door behind him. He nervously smoothed at non-existent wrinkles from his long jacket. The dark blonde was dressed in perfect fitting, straight leg black pants, and a matching long jacket, both made of the same material. From a distance, the material looked to be that of a glossy black suit, but up close you could see the texture and print, like that of a black reptile. The long-sleeve jacket was fitted to his trim form and fell to his knees. A hint of blue/violet color peeked out from beneath the slight opening at the top of the jacket and matched the tinted, oval-shaped glasses he wore. His dark blonde hair was brushed until it shone and hung thick and straight to just below his shoulders. With the look of uncertainty and vulnerability on his face, Heero found himself nearly breathless with desire. He took David's hands in his and gently squeezed them. 

"You look good enough to eat." he teased.

"Hum....".David eyed him suspiciously, humor returning to his worried expression. "Hors d'oeuvre, main course, or dessert?" He quizzed teasingly.

"How about an appetizer to start with?" Heero smiled and moved closer to capture the other's lips. David's mouth softened and opened easily against his persistent lips. 

David hummed his pleasure, but brought his hand up against Heero's chest, gently pushing him away. "We're late." he said a bit breathless and with an apologetic grin.

Heero nodded and took his hand. "Then let's get this over with." he said with a comforting smile, knowing that David needed his reassurance.

They walked towards the elevator in relative silence, both young men thinking about how the next few minutes would change their lives. They had spent the last year rebuilding their friendship, and David's trust in Heero. It wasn't an easy task as there were demons from the past to be dealt with, and time was needed to rebuild the fragile beginnings of trust. Heero's love of Duo only increased as he spent time with David. He had voiced his love for him often, only to have David accept it, but hesitant to repeat the words that had, in the past, been the undoing of all he had. He still guarded his heart closely to prevent the pain he had worked so hard to put behind him.

During the last year, Heero had displayed unwavering patience at David's hesitation and fears. Slowly in the last few months, the two merged into an awkward relationship between friendship and being a couple. The held each other, kissed and at times let their hands rove. But David was adamant that they keep their clothes on. He had to be sure before he went to a more physically intimate level in their relationship. Knowing Heero was close to the other former pilots, he was unsure how they would react to him being alive. If they rejected him, what would it mean to Heero? Though Heero had repeatedly expressed his love for him, David couldn't help to wonder at the cost. If Heero lost his close association with the others because of him, would he later be blamed and resented, and left again?

The elevator came to a stop on the main lobby floor and hand in hand, the two wordlessly walked in the direction of the ball room. They stopped at the reception room door, just before the door, and Heero could feel his companion's hand tremble even as it fiercely gripped his. The people behind them passed into the room as the two paused to exchange a worried look.

"It doesn't matter how they react, good or bad, I'll never leave you, David. Never!" Heero's voice was firm, and a look of determination reflected in the lenses of the glasses the other wore.

The blonde nodded and offered him a tremulous smile. Quickly glancing around to make sure no one was watching, Heero impulsively embraced and briefly kissed his love. "Courage. I'm right beside you." he whispered against his lips.

"I'm alright." David whispered back as he gave Heero a quick squeeze back. "If it goes badly, we'll leave, okay?"

Heero nodded. If it didn't go well, it would be his fault. He'd finally convinced David it was time to really put the past behind them and commence with their future. That meant no more hiding. The others needed to know he was alive and once again in Heero's life. "Love you." he said as his arm went around David's small waist and guided him into the room where the others were waiting. 

***********

Wufei was entertaining his two friends with earthbound gossip about Zechs and Noin, rumors about Une, and the behind the scene antics of Relena, when Trowa pulled on Quatre's sleeve and nodded towards the entrance of the room.

"Oh my." Quatre said, his eyes widening. Wufei quickly closed the blonde's dropped lower jaw and turned to see what had brought such a reaction. He almost dropped his own jaw as he saw Heero, dressed handsomely in his black tux, enter the reception hall with his arm around the most attractive young man he'd seen in a long while, maybe ever.

"Definitely male." Trowa said admiring the slender figure.

"Damn, what a looker!" Quatre's voice reflected his surprise. "Where'd he find this guy?"

"Got a great sense of style , too." Wufei added, appreciating the black European cut suit not too unlike his dress whites.

"Alright guys." Trowa began, his voice admonishing. "Get a hold of yourselves. We need to meet this important person in Heero's life and not scare him off by drooling all over him."

Quatre looked up into Trowa's face looking a bit hurt. "I am not drooling." he insisted. "Besides," he looked deeply into the other's beautiful green eyes and smiled slightly, taking nothing out of the sincerity he felt. "You're the only one I ever want to drool over."

Trowa smiled as he lifted his hand to touch his lovers upturned face. Wufei rolled his eyes heavenward. "Save it for later fellas." All three turned to watch Heero guide his companion through the crowd, stopping to speak to several people and introducing his guest.

"Looks like you're in luck, Quatre." Wufei elbowed the blonde in the side. "I think this guy is shorter and smaller than you are."

The Arabian's eyes lit up with his own visual confirmation. "Hey, your right!" he beamed. "I like him already."

"Ready to go?" Trowa asked the other two.

"Yes." Quatre answered excitedly. "Just remember to be on your best behavior, for Heero." he reminded them. Taking the lead, the smallest of the three led them through the crowd and approached their target.

Involuntarily, Quatre's hand went to his chest. A familiar but out-of-place memory-sensation ran through him as he approached the two. He could sense the nervous apprehension rolling off both of them. Heero looked up to see them coming and turned to whisper in his companions ear. Then, with a protective arm coming around his shoulders, turned the dark blonde man to face them.

**********

"They're here." Heero whispered into his ear, and David felt the reassuring arm over his shoulder as he was turned to face his past.

His first view of them was Quatre's beaming smile as he lead the other two towards them through the clusters of people. Though shorter than the two behind him, he was still taller than himself. David noted the changes in his former friends. The blonde's face had elongated a bit and had lost some of the boyishness that had endeared him to the group during the war. He was still strikingly handsome, as were they all. Trowa's height surprised him and his hair was cut much shorter to reveal both of his beautiful green eyes and fine, almost delicate bone structure. The former Heavyarm's pilot was as handsome as ever, just older looking with some fine lines by his eyes showing that happiness was a part of his life. Wufei had also grown to be as tall as Heero. There was a sense of calm and even humor that David didn't recognize. He hoped it was because Wufei had finally realized the inner peace he had lacked in his youth.

"Welcome, Heero." Quatre greeted them in his warm, friendly manner. "I was afraid you weren't going to make it in time." He quickly embraced the former Wing pilot in welcome and stepped back in anticipation of an introduction.

"Let me make you acquainted with my guest." Heero said formally. "Quatre Winner, meet David Miller, David, Quatre." 

Quatre extended his hand and a warm smile, and almost hesitating, the other put his hand out and wrapped his slender fingers around Quatre's, returning the firm handshake.

"Nice to meet you Quatre." David said, smiling nervously.

Quatre blinked in stunned amazement. There was something so familiar about this guy. "Have we met before?" he asked looking puzzled.

"Quite possibly." the other answered, leaning into Heero's side.

"Hum....David Miller." Quatre murmured, his brows furrowed together in thought. Suddenly his eyes lit up. "David Miller of the Think Tank Five?" he asked, and was pleased to be rewarded with a nod of confirmation. But his eyes narrowed as he scrutinized the other's features. "Your photographs don't do you justice. You look different from the magazine pictures." Quatre observed.

"That's because he uses a double." Heero interjected with a sly grin. "David's a bit of a recluse, and to protect his privacy he uses a decoy to appear in public for him."

Quatre turned a stunned look at Trowa. "That's a great idea, Trowa. Why didn't you, as head of my security, think of that for me?"

The taller of the young men rolled his eyes and sighed. "Because you are too well known, Quatre. People would recognize a double at this point."

"Hum....I suppose you're right. But Heero" he turned back to his Japanese friend accusingly. "You failed to mention this in your surveillance report last year."

"I had my reasons, which I'm sure will come to light tonight." was his cryptic answer.

Quatre huffed, but then turned to pull his companion closer. 

Heero continued with the introductions. "David, this is Trowa Barton, head of Winner Security and Quatre's partner."

Trowa stepped forward and extended his long, thin hand. "Welcome to L-4 David." He smiled pleasantly at the handsome young man being quite visibly sheltered by Heero's arm.

"Thank you, Trowa. It's nice to meet you."

Trowa then reached back and pulled Wufei forward.

Heero smiled. "Chang Wufei, David Morris."

"My pleasure." Wufei said quietly while studying the person before him. Something felt odd to him and he couldn't figure it out. Heero was pleasant, but noticeably nervous and so was his companion. There was something familiar about this guy. The voice, his build, his facial features, all called out a feeling of familiarity. He knew his instincts were good, honed during the war and with his work at the Preventers, and those instincts were telling him there was something about this person that set warning alarms off in his head, this person that Heero was obviously smitten with. He wished that he could see behind the tinted glasses to see the color and shape of his eyes. He just hoped he wouldn't recognize a criminal from the Most Wanted List posted at the Preventer's Office.

"Heero tells me you were recently married. Congratulations." David said in an attempt to keep the light conversation going, and hoping Wufei would stop staring at him like he was someone in a criminal line up. "Is your wife here?"

Wufei shook his head, still trying to fit the pieces together.

Quatre spoke up at his friend's hesitation to communicate. "No, she's pregnant and in the throws of morning sickness." he announced happily.

Heero beamed at the news. "Congratulations, Wufei. That's great!" Heero moved forward, releasing his hold on David to enthusiastically embrace the expectant father.

Wufei gladly accepted his friend's solicitations, but his smile faded as he looked over Heero's shoulder to see his companion's face lose it's color and a look of dismay crossed his features. A disquieting sense of de'javu hit Wufei unexpectedly. "David?" he asked concerned for the other. Heero immediately released him and whipped around and went to the smaller blonde's side.

"What's the matter?" He asked anxiously.

*************

Across the room Lady Une accepted a tasty treat from off of a silver tray a handsome young man in a waiter's uniform offered with a smile. She balanced it in one hand, the other held a champagne glass filled with the bubbly concoction for which the glass was named. She had observed, along with almost everyone else in the room, Heero's entrance with his overly handsome guest. Her keen eyes took in everything about the newcomer, his physical characteristics, Heero's possessiveness, and the other former pilots as they approached the two and then their interaction.

"What's so interesting?" Relena's voice cut into her observation. 

A wry and knowing smile graced the taller woman's face. "I suspect this evening is going to be very entertaining." She turned to the small blonde woman who looked quite beautiful with her blonde hair brushed up into a french twist and her strapless deep blue gown, showing off to perfection the figure beneath it, and bringing out the brilliance of her blue eyes. Relena raised a curious, perfectly plucked eyebrow in question.

Lady Une nodded to her right. "Heero's brought an interesting date."

Relena casually turned her head and took in the scene as Trowa shook the hand of an extremely good looking dark blonde haired young man. Heero's arm was possessively holding onto the slender shoulders as he was obviously introducing him to his fellow former pilots.

"Boyfriend?" Relena asked.

"Looks like it." Une replied with a knowing smile.

They watched as Heero embraced Wufei and the reaction afterwards.

"Well I'll be, it is him." Une said in an amazed but slightly amused tone. "I wondered if he would ever resurface."

Relena turned to look up, puzzled at her friend. "Who and what are you talking about?" she asked.

Without her gaze moving from the scene unfolding before her, Lady Une answered. "The dead has risen from the grave and will soon knock the former pilots on their collective butts." She had a droll smile on her face.

"What?" Relena's face mirrored her bafflement, then looked at the group in question.

"Keep a secret?" Une smiled conspiratorially. "At least for the moment?"

"Of course. I've got a top security clearance."

Une smiled patronizingly, but drew the former Queen closer to whisper into her diamond studded ear. "Duo Maxwell had risen from the dead."

Relena gasped at the idea and looked shocked at what she had just heard. She turned her wide eyes and focused on Heero as he moved back to check on the now, obviously distressed young man behind him. With Une's information, she could now definitely see the blonde's resemblance to the boy she had remembered from their teens.

"But how? Why?" She asked shocked at the news, then re-evaluated the scene she saw before her. "They don't know, do they?" She asked almost breathless with the realization.

Une shrugged her shoulders. "I think Heero does, but as for the others, I don't think so. Just keep an eye on what's happening. It should prove to be quite entertaining."

**********

"David?" Heero questioned the distress look on his love's pale face. When no response came immediately, Heero reached up and pulled the tinted glasses down just enough to study the wide amethyst eyes. They looked up him with uncertainty.

"Heero?" David's voice answered, and then silently looked for reassurance. Seeing Heero embracing Wufei brought back memories he had conjured up in his mind over the years, and he found himself shaken by it.

Heero's hand soothingly stroked David's back as his cobalt blue eyes radiated his love and concern.

"I....I'm sorry." David managed to say, his voice coming out small and self conscious. "Flashback." he explained simply.

Heero drew him into his side, about as close as he could in public to reassure him. They turned back to the three behind them.

"Sorry." David apologized, and blushing from embarrassment. He pushed his glasses back to their proper position on his face.

"Ah......that's alright." Quatre said a bit nervously, trying to smooth out the awkward moment. "Happens to us all the time, actually." he added honestly.

Trowa smiled slightly and nodded.

It was then that their attention turned to Wufei, looking pale as the color had drained from his face and his facial expression was that of being shocked and deeply shaken.

"Wufei?" Heero asked concerned and gripped David tighter to his side.

"C..C.....Can't be." he stammered, his eyes wide and incredulous at Heero's companion.

"What is it Wufei?" Quatre moved to his friend's side and muttered a command under his breath. "Stop staring at him."

Wufei turned his disbelieving eyes to his long-time, blonde friend. "I...it....it's not possible, is it?" he whispered.

Quatre was now worried, he had never seen Wufei like this before, visibly shaken and unsure, and he turned to his lover for help. "Something's wrong, Trowa." The tall man moved closer to lend his support.

Heero also stepped closer, drawing David with him. "It's all right Wufei." he quietly and knowingly reassured the other, having been in his place a year ago. "I almost passed out when I found out."

Wufei's wide incredulous eyes turned to Heero and then to his companion. "I..I..t..s...It's true? I'm not going crazy?" He asked stunned.

"It's true." Heero confirmed solemnly.

Quatre and Trowa felt definitely out of the loop and watched in further amazement as Wufei fell to his knees in front of Heero's boyfriend and grabbed him around his waist and silently wept into his stomach.

Heero stepped a bit to the side to give them room. He, Quatre, Trowa, and many of those in the immediate vicinity watched as David looked down to study the head buried against his stomach. Slowly, his right hand came up and tenderly stroked the top of the black hair gently, then moved down to finger the single braid that trailed down his back to his waist.

"You let you hair grow Wufei. It looks nice." he said softly, his tone warm.

The Chinese man lifted his face up, his eyes spilling with tears. "I grew it in memory of you." he whispered.

Quatre gasped and clutched wildly at Trowa. Then with unsteady footsteps forward, he approached David. Reaching a trembling hand slowly upward, he cautiously removed the glasses.

"Duo?" Trowa, standing immediately behind his lover, whispered in stunned disbelief.

David nodded. He was immediately embraced by two more pairs of arms in a powerful, awkward embrace. With his glasses removed, his tear-filled eyes, now openly displayed, raised up to meet Heero's equally affected eyes, and gave a relieved smile.

The three hugging and touching him to assure themselves that he was real, murmured their apologies and happy disbelief that he was alive.

"But how? Why?" Quatre asked pulling back slightly and quickly wiping the moisture from off his face. His gaze rested on the amethyst eyes he had never see the equal of.

"I'll tell you anything and everything, but later, alright? Tonight, I just want to know if you can forgive me and accept me back into your lives, as a part of Heero's life."

Quatre reached down and pulled Wufei from the floor to his feet. He then turned back to Duo and putting his hand on his cheek, leaned forward and chastely kissed him on the lips. Pulling back, he gave a sincere smile, silently signaling his acceptance of him in his life. Quatre then turned to tearfully embrace Heero, feeling overjoyed at his friend's happiness and for the end of his years of self-imposed solitude.

Trowa took Quatre's place immediately moving forward to repeat his actions, accepting the smaller man back.

Duo turned to face Wufei who still looked visibly shaken. "Wufei?" he said softly. "Can you forgive me and accept me back?" he asked quietly.

The Chinese man's face was full of emotion. "Only if you first forgive me for my past actions. My dishonor has haunted me all these years."

"Oh, Wufei," David replied with a soft, sad voice as he stretched his hand out to touch the wet cheek. "I forgave you years ago. When I was able to step away from my own anger and pain, I saw the whole situation much more clearly. Heero also told me that your physical relationship with him ended the moment my pain began. He explained a lot of things to me over the last year." Wiping the tears off the other's cheeks, David continued. "I'm glad you found happiness Wufei, truly I am." He then opened his arms and embraced his friend from the past.

The room around them seemed strangely quiet and an old gentleman close by cleared his throat loudly and his aged voice vocalized his thoughts. "They seem to really like young Yuy's friend." A few snickers could be heard immediately following the verbal observation. Then, slowly, the sound of laughter began and erupted around them. The five joined in even as they all wiped at the moisture from their eyes and faces.

They moved to the corner of the room for a little more privacy and caught up on their present lives. Each of their friends saw the happiness that radiated in the eyes of Heero and Duo who had asked them to call him David. Duo, he explained, had died in the war, taking most of the pain and sorrow with him to the grave.

Before they knew it, the room was emptying into the ballroom where the music had just begun to play.

"Well," Trowa began as he saw people filing out. "Do we join your guests, Quatre, or high-tail it out of here?" 

"What do you want to do?" Quatre turned to Heero and David.

"I haven't been out dancing since David came to be." the dark blonde said, giving Heero a hopeful look. "We don't have to stay all night." he added as a slight incentive.

Heero smiled. "Then let's go have some fun."

The five followed the mass leaving the reception room, and as a group moved towards the ballroom. 

"So, how long have you known?" Trowa asked Heero as they watched the two smaller men several feet in front of them. Quatre had latched onto David's arm and was busy catching him up on things and was probably talking a little business. He had been trying to meet with David Miller of the TTF for the last year. Now they all understood why the other was always reluctant to get together with him.

"About a year now." Heero replied. "I'll always be grateful to Quatre for sending me out to investigate the TTF."

"Did you realize it was him right away? I sure didn't." Trowa looked ahead to the person in question. "There's so much that's similar, but he's disguised himself well."

"I was rather like Wufei," Heero explained. "where I saw pieces that were somehow familiar, and then I over heard him say something alluding to his past, our past. That put it all together. It's taken the whole year for me to earn his trust."

Wufei, flanking Heero's other side looked curiously at his friend. "A year, why didn't you tell us then?"

"David asked me not to. He never expected any of us to ever find him, and when I did, we were both taken aback. I believe he needed to see if we could be friends before he could meet the rest of you again. I think it was also a way for him to test me, to see if I was trustworthy."

Both of his present companions nodded their heads thoughtfully at what he'd said.

"Quatre said you've been "courting" him. What exactly does that mean?" Trowa asked with a sly smile on his face.

Heero returned it, knowing what Trowa was after. "It means I've tried to convince him that I'm worth keeping around in any way I could, other than in physical intimacy."

"So you haven't.......yet?" Wufei's eyes opened wide at the thought of Heero's unusual wait.

Heero shook his head. "I think his meeting you again and your acceptance of him was the last obstacle." he replied and inwardly hoped it was true.

"You must want this badly to have been so patient." Trowa said admiring his friend for his tenacity.

"I want this more than anything I've ever wanted for myself." Heero's voice was a bit wistful as his gaze settled on the object of his desire in front of him. 

As if sensing the blue eyes resting on him, David turned his head and flashed his brilliant smile, his eyes sparkling with excitement and happiness.

Quatre turned to look back also, the blue/violet glasses perched on his pert nose. "These are the coolest glasses!" he exclaimed, his astonishment audible and visible. "They're David's invention. The color is on the outside lens, but from the inside, it's not dark, only the bright lights are toned down. Here, try them." he took them off and handed them back. Trowa and Wufei both remarked on the ingenuity as they each peered through the new-patented lenses.

"They'll be on the market in three months." David said in passing. "I'd be happy to send each of you a couple of pairs, that is, if you like them."

They all enthusiastically agreed. Quatre then turned to Duo, his face sobering. "You've done very well for yourself, haven't you David?"

The dark blonde shrugged. "I guess in monetary means, most people would think so. But that wasn't really my goal." He looked up at the four as they had stopped just outside the ballroom door, the music beginning in the background. "My first goal was to become a new person. But I had become so use to being with four others, that I felt uncomfortable being alone for too long. I decided to cultivate a working friendship with boys so different from what we were. At first, our only priorities were getting a good education and to be friends. It helped fill the hole in my life that I created when I was hurt and estranged myself from you. I did make friends, and their families made me a part of them. I think having been a gundam pilot, and working towards completing missions, prepared me for organizing the others and steering them in the direction I wanted them to go. I was lucky it worked and I successfully moved on, but I never really forgot, I just let go. The things we have created is the real reward, the money isn't really that important." He then gave them a cunning smile. "But it sure is nice." They all agreed with good humor.

They talked for a few more moments before they turned to enter the ballroom. Almost immediately, Lady Une approached them. "Sorry to interrupt Quatre, but Relena is waiting for you to the right of the stage to officially welcome everyone." she informed him.

The Winner heir turned back to his friends. "I'll find you after the business is done." he assured them, and then he disappeared into the crowd.

The tall, perfect postured woman turned to the remaining four. "Well, looks like a reunion to me?" she said with a crooked, knowing smile. Since none of the four were inclined to say anything, she extended her hand to the new comer. "Nice to see you, 02, when did you pop out of the grave?"

Four jaws dropped.

"How did you know?" David asked, obviously startled.

"We found the buried corpse near the site where your gundam was detonated and did a DNA test. It proved that it wasn't you, but a soldier from the base you had attacked the day before the destruction of your gundam."

Wufei looked like he was about to explode. "And you never thought to mention this to me?" he asked incredulous, disbelieving his boss at the Preventers would have withheld such important information from him.

"Relena told me Heero's version of what happened, and I assumed if 02 wanted to surface, he would. I've learned over the years that it's best to let dead dogs lie. However, " she continued intensely studying the small blonde man before her. "I would like to hear how this reunion came about, who you are now, and about that dead soldier we found."

"He was a casualty of war, a corpse that Duo used to convince us of his death." Heero interjected in defense of his love. He pulled the other's slender body to fit closely into his side in a protective manner. No one would ever separate them again. "Besides, we were all given immunity after the war, and Duo was given one posthumously." 

Lady Une studied them for a moment longer, her eyes taking in every nuance. "Alright, I'll accept that for now." She was about to say more when Quatre's voice spoke through the sound system, welcoming everyone. His welcome was short, polite, and to the point. He then turned it over to Relena who followed his example and wished everyone to have an enjoyable time. Quatre then escorted her from off the stage just as the music began to fill the room. It was dancing music, definitely geared for the younger set. 

David's face lit up. "Come on Heero." He pulled the Japanese young man onto the rapidly filling dance floor.

"Feel like dancing?" Wufei asked his boss. The two quickly joined the others. Quatre returned alone and he and Trowa followed. They had all forgotten what a good dancer Duo had been, and they watched in appreciation as he danced for Heero alone as he mouthed the words to the sappy love song that was being sung. It seemed wholly appropriate.

"The daylight fades and slowly, the time with you is standing still. 

I'm waiting for you only, the slightest touch and I feel weak. 

I cannot lie, from you I cannot hide. I've lost the will to try. Can't hide it. Can't fight it.

So go on, go on, come on leave me breathless.

Tempt me, tease me, till I can't deny this

loving feeling, let me drown in your kiss

Go on, go on, yeah, yeah. Come on."

David unbuttoned his long jacket and peeled it off, revealing a form fitting, though not quite skin tight, amethyst color shirt with long sleeves and a crew neck. The shirt fit neatly into his low on the hip dress pants. The outfit showing off his excellent physical condition.

"Damn!" Quatre muttered to his mate. "I think I'm gonna have to start working out." he declared as David's slender hips moved to the music in an enticing manner. All of the former pilots danced well, but Quatre and Duo had, in the past, been the more showier, sensual dancers. Some things, it seemed, hadn't changed much over the years.

The evening progressed enjoyably. Even Wufei, who hated such affairs, smiled throughout, murmuring occasionally how he wished Sally was present.

Near midnight, Heero began to make their excuses. Quatre asked them to wait a moment and returned with Relena who already knew who David was and welcomed him graciously. She accepted a dance with first he, and then Heero.

In the mean time, Quatre, Wufei and Trowa were taking bets as to whether the two would share a room that night, or if they would even make it that far. None of them had failed to notice Heero's hands were constantly in contact with David's body.

At last they bid goodnight to the two who seemed anxious to retire. Quatre made them promise to meet in his suite for breakfast at 10:00 a.m. David had assured them he would answer any further questions they had at that time.

The Winner suites were on the thirtieth floor of the posh hotel. The elevator that started out rather full, dwindled slowly in the long, constantly interrupted assent. Heero and David were pressed to the back of the elevator, against the wall and Heero's hand gripped David's behind his back. The door finally opened to their floor and Heero led his love out. They walked silently until they stood facing David's door.

Pulling him into his arms, Heero moved slowly forward and kissed him as he had wanted to do all evening. Burying his hand into the thick blonde hair behind his neck, his kissed deepened along with his desire. "I want you David." he said, his voice low and sensual against the other's mouth.

"I want you too, Heero." David replied breathlessly.

Heero drew back to study the beautiful eyes he saw even in his sleep. "I want tonight to begin the rest of our lives together." Heero said with intensity.

David nodded.

Reaching into his pocket, Heero drew out a small case and opened it. A black band embedded with amethyst jewels was displayed. Heero took it out and looked up into David's face. "I'd like you to wear this as a symbol of my love and fidelity. There will be no other for me, David. You have my heart in your hands."

"And mine in yours, I....I love you." David whispered, his eyes wide in awe, and bright with happy tears.

Heero put the ring on his left ring finger. They both jumped fractionally at a slight sound down the hotel hallway. Heero smiled knowingly. "They're watching us." he whispered to David. "Shall we give them something worth remembering?"

Very reminiscent of the boy he had once been, a slightly wicked smile lit on the blonde's face a fraction of a moment before he launched himself onto Heero. Jumping up, his arms circled around the Japanese man's neck and this legs wrapped around Heero's slender hips. They then proceeded to kiss each other for all they were worth, and moved to lean against the door. 

Distracted as he was, Heero still managed to fish into David's pocket for the insert key to his room with one hand, while his other rested on David's slender hip. Locating the piece of plastic, he fumbled for a moment to find the slot while being thoroughly engaged in a delicious lip lock. A moment later, the door flew open and they both fell into the room with a dull thud. The door slammed resolutely behind them.

Down the hall, the three former pilots held at an angle the compact cases of pressed powder that Quatre had hastily borrowed from his sisters. The mirrors they provided had allowed them to view the happiest moment in their friends' lives. All three compacts snapped closed with a decided click.

"You can get off the floor now, Quatre." Trowa said with droll amusement, even as he offered him a hand up. With three of them peeking around the corner, there wasn't enough room for them to stand together, so they had to tier their spying. Quatre, being the smallest, had been elected to get the lowest point, being the floor.

He now stood, automatically straightening his jacket, and with a warm dreamy smile on his face he sighed. "I love a happy ending." 

"You're so soft, Winner." Wufei snorted, even as he wiped the suspicious moisture from the corner of his eye.

  
  


The End


End file.
